


The Miscellaneous Man

by orphan_account



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Blurry is in Tyler's head, Brendon isn't an asshole, Friends to Lovers, It'll get better, Josh is just a friendly dude, M/M, Suicidal Thoughts, Taco Engineer, Tyler is scared of new people, Tyler likes to write a lot, Tyler loves cherry coke for some reason, kind of graphic depictions of Rape/Non-con, mentions of self harm, tyler is sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-01
Updated: 2017-07-25
Packaged: 2018-10-26 03:53:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 8
Words: 23,679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10779030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: “Buddy?” Tyler heard the bartender ask in an almost worried tone.“Sorry, what?” Tyler blinked tiredly.“I asked,” The bartender lightly sighed. “What could I get for ya?”“Um, just a cherry coke, please.” Tyler asked in a quiet tone before the bartender walked off.Tyler sighed lightly and looked back down to his notebook filled with chicken scratch. It was almost hard for Tyler to read his own writing. ‘Just another thing you can’t do right.’ the voice inside of the back of Tyler’s mind spoke up. He swallowed, shaking his head tightly before picking up the black ball point. His hand shook with the added weight.





	1. Make Me

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in a span of five hours, so it might be really bad. This is also my first Twenty One Pilots fanfiction, but I hope to do more. I'm always looking for ways to improve my writing, so please, leave a comment if you feel I could improve in any ways or just leave a comment in general. Enjoy! Stay safe <3

Life had always been a- Struggle for Tyler Joseph

He had been kicked out of his house the day before his eighteenth birthday, he hardly had any friends (that’s if you don’t count Brendon, Tyler didn’t), Tyler worked a nine to five job almost always seven days a week, and he could hardly afford to make his rent nowadays. Some days he wondered why he even bothered anymore. With life, that is.

On days like those Tyler went to the bar. It was always the same bar, Sherri’s. It was something about the atmosphere there that would draw Tyler in. Don’t get him wrong, Tyler was not by any means an alcoholic. He was never a big drinker, still isn’t. Tyler Joseph has seen first hand what alcohol can do to a person, make them do. That was why, on days like those, Tyler would sit at the bar, sipping on a cherry coke. Just a cherry coke. Tyler would usually go to Sherri’s on Sunday’s. Sunday’s were Tyler’s suicide days. 

There was always a recurring crowd on Sunday’s. There were the token drunk middle-aged men who sat in the booths at the front, a few college students wanting to unwind before class the next day, and then there were the sad straight edges who were too scared to drink but also needed to find a way to forget about life outside of the chipped wooden doors for a while. Take your guess as to which category Tyler Joseph belonged to. There was also a miscellaneous category for the people that Tyler couldn’t quite categorize as easily as the rest. So far the miscellaneous category consisted of one person. He was a regular (as far as Tyler could tell) who had a lot of downtime, apparently. He always sat in the same seat every time he came in, which just so happened to be the one directly to the left of Tyler, even though there was at least another dozen empty seats for the man to sit in. 

The miscellaneous man had bright yellow hair and always wore worn out band t-shirts, he had a tattoo sleeve that depicted a tree that ran mid-wrist to his shoulder. Tyler had seen it one afternoon when the man sat down next to Tyler in his usual spot with a Nasa Muscle shirt. Tyler wished that the stranger would wear it again sometime, though that was probably unlikely considering that it was now the middle of December. 

Tyler blinked away his thoughts as he sat in his usual spot, waving down the bartender before grabbing his notebook from his bag. Tyler’s therapist had recommended to him that he write down his thoughts whenever he was feeling the way he was now. Tyler had thought that the idea was useless at first, but after a few weeks of writing his deepest and darkest thoughts down, he could really see the appeal. He felt a small amount of the colossal weight he had been carrying with him since he was seventeen lift from his pale shoulders. It felt, nice.

“Buddy?” Tyler heard the bartender ask in an almost worried tone.

“Sorry, what?” Tyler blinked tiredly.

“I asked,” The bartender lightly sighed. “What could I get for ya?” 

“Um, just a cherry coke, please.” Tyler asked in a quiet tone before the bartender walked off.

Tyler sighed lightly and looked back down to his notebook filled with chicken scratch. It was almost hard for Tyler to read his own writing. ‘Just another thing you can’t do right.’ the voice inside of the back of Tyler’s mind spoke up. He swallowed, shaking his head tightly before picking up the black ball point. His hand shook with the added weight.

l-/

It was another hour, several filled notebook pages, and two empty glasses in front of himself before Tyler heard the bell above the chipped wooden doors open ring again. Tyler glanced behind himself to see the familiar stranger standing in the doorway. He wore an ‘I want to believe’ shirt with a jean jacket over and now had decent sized black gages pierced through his earlobes. Tyler thought he was beautiful.

Tyler let out a quiet breath through his nose before turning his gaze back to the half-filled notebook page in front of him. He picked up the ball point and started lightly tapping it against the paper just as the familiar stranger sat beside him in his usual spot to the left.

Tyler dared not look at the stranger since he was pretty sure that he had seen Tyler stare at him for a brief second when he walked in. Tyler’s face took a light shade of red as he began tapping the pen a little faster.

“What are you writing?” Tyler heard the stranger beside him speak and felt him lean over, trying to read the deepest of Tyler’s thoughts.

“I- Um, nothing.” Tyler spoke awkwardly as he abruptly shut the notebook before the beautiful stranger could read his writing. The last thing he wanted was for the man next to him to know every dark thought he had about himself.

“It didn’t look like nothing.” The stranger spoke again, this time with a smile that sent a wave of warmth through Tyler’s freezing body. 

“I-” Tyler began, only to be cut off by the bartender from earlier.

“What can I get you, Josh?” It was Josh then. It was nice to put a name to a face, Tyler guessed.

“I’ll have a Jack and Coke and a cherry Coke for my friend.” 

The bartender nodded with a slight smile before leaving again.

“You didn’t have to-” Tyler began.

“I wanted to.” Josh smiled and another wave of heat ran through Tyler’s body. Damn him.

“You don’t even know my name.” Tyler countered as he stuffed his notebook into his bag. 

“I know your drink.” This time Tyler smiled. The first real smile he smiled for nearly two years.

l-/

“You’ve got to be kidding me!” Josh laughed lightly.

“No, no I’m not. My boss is a horrible guy.” Tyler chuckled and took a sip of probably his fifth drink and Josh was still on his second.

“Dude that’s so fucked up,” Josh laughed again. “Isn’t that like, somewhat illegal?” 

“Apparently not.” Tyler shook his head. “Apparently giving your employee unpaid overtime over cutting a peach wrong is perfectly legal in the eyes of the law.” 

“My boss is so cool compared to yours-” Josh started, taking a sip of his drink before continuing. “Sometimes, when I don’t come in late, he lets me stay after hours to play the drum set we use for lessons.” 

“Really? Wow, I wish my boss were that cool. I show up three minutes late and he cuts my pay. Where do you work?” 

“Guitar Center,” Josh stated before downing the rest of his drink and flagging down the bartender again. “It’s fine for now, but my dream is to be in a band someday. Be famous.” Josh put an emphasis on famous and for some reason it made Tyler’s heart flutter inside of his pale chest.

“I’m sure you’ll be able to follow your dream someday, I mean I’ve never heard you play-”

“Maybe you could. hear me play that is.”

Tyler smiled, his eyes diverting from Josh’s eyes to his lips for barely a second. “I’d like that, Josh.”

“I’d also like that,” Josh paused. 

“Tyler.” Tyler spoke quietly, a faint smile on his lips as he watched the other man smile.

“Tyler.” Josh paused as if he was committing the name to memory. “ Maybe you could give me your number and I can text you when I can play for you.”

“That sure would make things easier.” Tyler laughed lightly and grabbed Josh’s phone as it was handed to him. He punched in the first half of his number before thinking his decision over in his head. He really liked Josh. a lot. Just the way the man smiled sent butterflies pounding against the inners of his stomach. From what Tyler could tell Josh was a good person, they had talked about families, friends, work, and just about everything else people could talk about. Not one thing set up a red flag. Could anyone be so perfect? Could anyone so perfect be into Tyler? The man was as skinny and pale as someone could be, he wrote his feelings down in a notebook like a goddamn diary and he constantly had voices- a voice in the back of his mind yelling out all of Tyler’s insecurities at him. He was a goddamn mess. ‘Glad you didn’t forget about me.’ 

Tyler swallowed and closed his eyes for a second before typing in the remaining digits of his phone number and handing the phone back to Josh.

“Hey, are you okay?” Josh asked, placing a warm hand on the side of Tyler’s arm.

‘Tell him how fucked you are in the head, scare him away just like the rest of them.’

“Yeah, yeah I just need to..” Tyler swallowed again. “I just need to go to the bathroom. I’ll be right back.” Tyler didn’t wait for Josh’s reply before he was pushing himself from the stool and quickly walking to the men’s restroom.

l-/

In the bathroom, Tyler made sure to check that all of the stalls were empty before walking up to the mirror and staring at his own reflection, his hands white-knuckling on the sink.

‘He’s just looking for someone quick, easy, and you fit the bill.’

‘Stop it. Please.’

‘Do you really think you’re worth something to him? You have talked to him once. He just wants a quick f-’

“I said, stop it.” Tyler gritted out, his eyes snapping shut.

‘The truth hurts, doesn’t it?’

l-/

“Hey, sorry I was gone for so long- I just wasn’t feeling-”

“It’s fine, don’t worry.” That damn smile again. “I’m actually getting pretty hungry, do you maybe want to get out of here? Go get Taco Bell or something?” 

“I- um- I don’t-” Tyler stammered, his fingers worrying the fabric of his sweater.

“If you don’t like Taco Bell we could always go somewhere else.” If Tyler didn’t know any better, he would think that Josh sounded worried.

“No, no. Taco Bell is fine.” Tyler let out a breath and smiled weakly.

“Are you-?”

“I’m fine. I promise.” ‘Didn’t mommy ever tell you lying is bad?’

“Okay.” Josh smiled again. “Do you want to take my car?” Josh asked, standing and pulling out his wallet.

“Sure.” Tyler did the same. He stood and reached into his bag to-

“I got it, Ty.” Tyler’s heart fluttered at the new nickname.

“Are you sure?” Tyler asked, wallet still in hand.

“Yes, I’m sure.” Josh smiled a beautiful smile. It was something Tyler had never seen in his life. He wanted to see more of it.

l-/

“So, what kind of music do you listen to?” Josh asked, his thumbs tapping the fake leather of the steering wheel. 

“Um, I used to listen to a lot of Blink-182 songs, but now I’ve been getting into more Death Cab for Cutie.” Tyler speaks way more nervously than he was at the bar, the bar was a controlled environment- alone is Josh’s car- anything could happen.

“Really? Dude, I love Blink-182!” The beat of Josh’s thumbs against the steering wheel became more rapid. Tyler smiled at that. Josh sounded like a kid on Christmas hearing the news that he just got a puppy. It was cute, actually.

“I could tell from the shirt you were wearing a week ago.” Tyler chuckled and sat back in the passenger seat. Josh’s car was nice. It was definitely a reflection of Josh himself. The interior was a light gray and the exterior was a deep red. Jose had a plethora of keychains hanging from the rear view mirror, some were band themed and others were just quotes. Tyler smiled lightly as he got a glance of the one matching Josh’s ‘I want to believe’ shirt. 

“So you did notice me,” Josh smiled and glanced to Tyler. Tyler’s heart skipped a beat. “I was kind of hoping you would’ve talked to me after the first few weeks of me sitting next to you.”

“Why would you do that?” Tyler asked, only half-jokingly.

“Because I thought you looked interesting.” Tyler gave Josh a confused look. “Not in a bad way or anything! It’s just- how you only ordered cherry Coke every day I saw you and how you would keep to yourself and write for hours.” Josh took another glance at Tyler before swallowing and switching his focus back to the road. “Plus, I, uh- thought you were pretty cute.” 

‘Told ya so.’

“Josh-” Tyler started, sitting up in his seat.

“I don’t know if you feel the same way- but if you don’t that’s fine, you’re a cool guy. I’d like to stay friends with you, at least.”

It was silent for a few awkward second before Tyler finally spoke up again.

“Josh, I think you’re cute, too.” 

“You do..?” Josh asked, not daring to look at Tyler this time.

“Yes, I do, but I don’t think I’m ready for-” Tyler began, his words going at a hundred miles per hour.

“I understand.” 

‘He’s lying. He just wants in your pants like all the rest.’

“You do?”

“Of course.”

“I wish there were more guys like you.” Tyler confessed and sat back.

‘But there aren’t’

There were no more words beyond that point. After a few minutes of comfortable silence between the two Josh had put in a Blink-182 CD and turned it up enough for people outside could hear, even with the windows rolled up. Tyler smiled. 

l-/

“So, what do you want?” Josh asked as he opened the door to the all mighty Taco bell for Tyler. What an honor.

“Definitely the Cheesy Gordita Crunch.” Tyler spoke with a hum, his stomach growling as he stepped further into the restaurant.

“That’s like the staple of Taco Bell.” Josh commented with a smirk.

“Yeah, big staple.” Tyler added as he waited for Josh.

“Hi! Welcome to Taco Bell, what may I get for you?” The lady behind the register greeted the two men as they walked up. Tyler reminded himself to google what the people behind the registers at Taco Bell were called. Cashiers? no. Taco Engineers? Tyler hoped that was the answer.

“Uh, yes I will have the Chilly Cheese burrito and he will have the Cheesy Gordita Crunch.” Josh spoke up before Tyler did. Tyler was grateful for Josh’s ability to talk in public, Tyler tried to keep his speaking to strangers to a low whenever he could and it seemed like he had already talked to enough strangers for the night.

“Okay, any drinks?” The Taco Engineer asked the pair.

“Two large Mountain Dew Baja Blasts, please.” God, Josh was so polite. Why did he have to be so polite?

“Alrighty, that’ll be nine forty-six.” The Taco Engineer spoke with a smile. Tyler couldn’t help but smile back before reaching into his bag to grab his wallet.

“Ty, I got it.” Josh spoke, already taking out his own wallet.

“Hey, you paid for drinks, least I can do is pay for Taco Bell.” Tyler gave Josh a reassuring smile and handed the girl a ten and told her to just keep the change.

The girl behind the counter smiled and told the pair that she would be right back with their food. It was late and it seemed as though besides Josh, Tyler, and the Taco Engineer, the place was empty. 

“It’s weird seeing a Taco Bell so empty.” Tyler confessed, stuffing his hands into his pockets as he glanced around.

“It’s nice though, you don’t really see many fast food chains this empty nowadays.” Josh spoke, watching Tyler as he scanned the rest of the room.

“Alrighty, here’s your food and I put a few sauce packets in there for you.” The Taco Engineer spoke as she handed the bag of food to Josh along with the tray with their drinks. 

“Thank you.” The two spoke in unison.

Tyler and Josh looked at each other and with one glance, burst out into laughter. Tyler had no idea as to why it was so funny, it just was. They walked out together, their laughter subsiding when they reached the grand Taco Bell doors. 

“Are we going to eat in your car?” Tyler asked with a small chuckle.

“No, of course not. I have a better idea.” Josh spoke, leading Tyler around to the side of the building.

“What’re we gonna do? Eat in the parking lot of Taco Bell?” Tyler laughed this time as he followed closely behind Josh, his hands stuffed deeply into his jacket’s pockets. It was December, after all.

“Hush.” Tyler could practically hear the smirk in Josh’s voice as they reached the middle of the side of the building. “Follow me.” Josh spoke softly, putting the top of the bag in his mouth to make his right hand available. 

“Don’t tell me we’re-”

“Shh.”

“Fine.”

Tyler rolled his eyes playfully as Josh steadily began climbing the ladder up to the fucking roof of Taco Bell. Was he crazy? He had to be.

‘He’s trying to take you somewhere more ‘secluded’.’

‘Shut up. Josh wouldn’t-’

‘You don’t know Josh.’

‘He wouldn’t.’

“You know, I’m pretty sure things like climbing on the rooftop of Taco Bell are illegal.” Tyler pointed out, just before he began to follow Josh up the ladder.

“Then thstop climbing.” Josh looked down at Tyler for just half a second before continuing to climb, bag in mouth and drink tray in hand. Tyler could swear that even in the dark he could see Josh smirking.

“Make me.”


	2. Numb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A peek into Tyler's workplace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As a lot of you may notice, I did upload a different rendition of this chapter a few days ago, but I didn't really like what happened in that chapter so, here we are. There's a small scene where a man kind of insults Tyler by saying some bad things. You'll know when you get to it.  
> As always, please leave a comment telling me anyway I could improve my writing!

“Welcome to my humble abode.” Josh spoke, dropping the bag of their food from his mouth and into his hand.

“This is the roof of Taco Bell, Josh.” Tyler shook his head and chuckled. Josh was such a fucking dork. 

“And it's where I feel most at home, Tyler.” The yellow-haired man smiled again and sat down against the boxed roof fan. Damn him.

“Whatever you say, I just want my food.” Tyler spoke as he sat beside Josh against the fan. Their shoulders brushed a few times before they sat comfortably there, together. Tyler looked down at his floral converse. Anywhere but at Josh.

“As you wish, one staple menu item.” Josh displayed the perfectly wrapped taco in his hand as the other waved in front of it as if he were some sort of show girl in a game show. Tyler rolled his eyes playfully and took his taco from Josh’s hand. Even though Tyler would love to play into Josh’s weird fantasy, he was starving and needed something to stop the low grumbles in his stomach.

“So,” Tyler spoke between chews. “Why the rooftop of Taco Bell?” 

“What do you mean?” Josh asked, mouth full of a disgusting mixture of burrito and a Mountain Dew Baja. Tyler would have gagged if he didn’t know who the mouth belonged to. 

“Of all places to go, the rooftop of Taco Bell is what you chose. Why?” Tyler asked, brushing off little pieces of taco shell and meat from his black pants onto the cold cemented ground. Ceiling? Roof? 

Josh shrugged, his eyes wandering around the rooftop. “Why not? Sometimes you just gotta- live, I guess. Try something you’ve never tried.”

“Y’know, you’re pretty wise for someone with a mouth full of greasy meat and cheese sauce.” Tyler commented, his eyes carefully watching the other in the dark.

“You know it.” Josh flashed a smile that looked ridiculous considering the copious amount of food in his mouth making it so his mouth was swelled up to half it’s size. Tyler laughed again and the two sat up there, on the roof of Taco Bell in comfortable silence. That was if you didn’t count the crunch of taco shells and the sound of Baja Blasts being slurped up through plastic straws. It was kind of.. Perfect. “I was thinking that after this we could go bowling or something, I know this great place th-”

“Actually, I kind of have to work tomorrow..” Tyler frowned down at the melting slush that sat on the inside of his cup. “My boss is just so crazy, if I oversleep-”

“It’s fine, Tyler, promise.” Josh gave Tyler a reassuring smile, even going as far as showing Tyler the plethora of food in his cheeks. “Another time, perhaps?”

“Perhaps.” 

l-/

“I guess this is me,” Tyler sighed, gathering up his things and making sure he had everything before looking back to Josh who almost looked as disappointed as Tyler felt. “Tonight was fun. Thank you, Josh.”

 

“It was, wasn’t it, Tyler?” Josh chuckled and small smile crinkles formed just to the side of his eye. Tyler’s heart skipped a beat and he could’ve sworn in that moment that Josh Dun’s smile alone would be the death of him. “Maybe I can see you again sometime?.”

“Perhaps.” Tyler joked, his arms holding tightly to his bag. Josh rolled his eyes playfully and mumbled something that Tyler couldn’t quite hear. 

The two stared at each other for a few moments in a perfect silence, the sweet sounds of Blink-182’s “All The Small Things” playing softly in the background as everything else began to fade beside Joshua Dun. “Can I walk you to your car?” Josh suddenly asked, breaking the warm silence that enveloped the two in time.

“My car is five feet away from yours.” Tyler pointed out with a smile. “But yes, I’d love that.”

So the two got out and walked the five-foot distance between Josh’s car and Tyler’s. The cold of December made Tyler’s cheeks cold and red and nothing seemed better. “Will you be here next Sunday?” Josh asked just as Tyler opened his car door.

“Always am.” Tyler responded cleverly, throwing his bag into the passenger seat and buckling his seatbelt before looking back up to those big brown eyes for the thousandth time this night. Josh sat his head on his arms as they rested against Tyler’s now open car window. 

“Good. I’ll hold you to it.” Josh leaned forward and everything around Tyler seemed to freeze. ‘Oh God, oh God what is he doing? Oh no oh no oh no-’ And suddenly soft, warm lips touched onto Tyler’s freezing forehead. Only, it didn’t feel the slightest bit.. Romantic as it did friendly. Tyler opened closed eyes that he didn’t even register were closed until Josh pulled away. “Goodnight, Ty.” Josh spoke with a warm smile that heated up Tyler’s freezing body like a bursting flame. 

Tyler spoke a soft goodbye before Josh was getting back into his car and driving off. It was a few seconds before Tyler was doing the same only in the opposite direction. This time Tyler’s cheeks weren’t red because of the cold. 

 

l-/

 

The next morning Tyler woke up with a headache and several messages from an unknown number. The noise of an exhausted yawn filled Tyler’s nearly empty apartment followed by the sound of a bed creaking and light footsteps. 

Tyler sighed at himself in his bathroom mirror as he ran a hand down his face. The bags under his eyes could almost be compared to the black eye he had acquired somewhere in seventh grade. Tyler blinked once. Twice. Possibly a third time and the memories of the night before flooded his brain like the sea onto a beach. He touched the spot on his forehead where the lips of a handsome stranger that hadn’t bothered to talk to him for weeks had touched last night in the street in front of a bar that Tyler had occupied far too often. 

Tyler found himself smiling at himself in the mirror for just a single moment before he realized he would be late for work if he didn’t get his ‘ass in gear NOW.’ as reminded by the voice in the back of his head. Tyler simply let out another breath and turned on the shower head to as cold as it could go. 

l-/

“Joseph.” The too familiar voice of his dreadful boss called out from the shoe box like office that he had occupied for the entire time Tyler had worked at the small theater.

“Yes, sir?” Tyler asked tiredly, his hands cupping each other behind his back as he stepped into the small office.

“You’re late again. This is the third time this month.” His boss commented in monotone as he filed through a stack of papers, his glasses hanging off of his fat nose.

“My shift starts at ten, sir.” Tyler pointed out, his voice small and quiet. “It’s nine fifty-eight now.” He spoke as he looked up at the clock that hung on the yellowing walls of the small shoe box.

“Yes, but you were supposed to report here at nine-thirty for training.” His boss added, slamming the papers onto his desk, sending others flying. Tyler kneeled down and began picking up the scattered papers on the tile floor. 

“I’m sorry, sir. I must’ve forgotten.” Tyler apologized, placing the papers on the corner of his boss's desk and standing just as he had before, his hands behind his back and stance straight.

“You must’ve forgotten?” ‘Why do you let him push you around, huh? We both know that if you weren’t such a wimp you wouldn’t let this fat asshole push you around, but we both know how that ended last time.’ “That’s the worst excuse I’ve heard in years, Joseph.” His boss scoffed and shook his head. “I’m docking your pay and you’re working the late shift tonight.”  
“Sir, that’s not f-” Tyler began, his voice breaking.

“I don’t want to hear another word, Joseph. You’re on trash can duty.” 

Tyler nodded stiffly and walked away from the shoe box office and headed behind the candy counter to search for the trash bags. He almost felt like crying. “He sure gave it to you in there, didn’t he?” A voice asked beside him and Tyler turned his head to look up, hitting his head on the top of the counter with a hiss in the process.

“Yeah, yeah he did..” Tyler rubbed the back of his head. He was definitely going to have to put ice on that. 

“My name’s Jenna, I’m new.” The girl- Jenna gave Tyler a sympathetic smile and extended her hand for Tyler to shake.

“I’m guessing you were the new employee I was supposed to train, then.” Tyler shook Jenna’s hand with the friendliest looking smile he could muster. 

“Yes, you guessed correct.” She smiled back, letting their hands drop as she let go of Tyler’s. “And your name is..?” 

“Oh! Tyler, sorry.” He apologized, clasping his hands behind his back as a nervous habit. “I’m not exactly.. Used to meeting new people.” Tyler chuckled a little at the end and rubbed the back of his head and noticed that there was a small bump forming where he had hit the glass of the candy bar.

“It’s nice to meet you, Tyler.” Jenna smiled again and giggled. Tyler noticed that she had a very.. Young personality, though she couldn’t possibly be more than five years younger than Tyler himself. 

“Has anyone shown you around yet?” Tyler asked, shoving his hands into his pockets and tapping the glass screen of his phone out of old habit. In the back of his mind somewhere he hoped that those messages he saw earlier were from Josh, the handsome stranger he had let get closer than anyone else had in a very long time.

“No, but Brendon.. Er.. offered.” Jenna spoke awkwardly and with a small shrug. 

“Well, it was a good thing you didn’t accept.” Tyler joked before leading Jenna around the theater and explaining exactly what her job would consist of. Popcorn clean up, working the candy desk, busting the kids sneaking into R-rated movies. The usual generic things they show in the movies, really. Tyler kind of found it ironic, actually. It was nice to have a new face in the theater for once. Brendon was cool, Tyler supposed. Mark and Pete weren’t so bad, but Tyler had only gotten to know Mark on a friendly basis a few weeks ago and Jenna seemed.. Different. She was nice, as far as Tyler could tell. He hoped to befriend her in the future. 

l-/

 

On Tyler’s lunch break, he walked down the street to a burger joint and sat down in a bright red booth by the window. He had seen the place a few weeks ago on his usual drive to work. Either he hadn’t noticed it before or it had just opened. Either way, he just hoped that the food was good.

With a small sigh, Tyler reached into his pocket and set his phone onto the booth table.

‘Was the kiss too much?’  
received 3:20 a.m.

 

‘I’m sorry if I pushed you too far or anything.’  
received 3:20 a.m.

 

‘You’re probably sleeping right now.’  
received 3:23 a.m.

 

‘We should hang out today, my boss is putting me in charge tonight.’  
received 12:19 p.m.

 

‘Maybe you could stop by and keep me company at the store?’  
received 12:20 p.m.

 

‘It gets lonely with no one but a few guitars and violins.’  
received 12:20 p.m.

 

‘You didn’t push anything, trust me.’  
sent 12:37 p.m.

 

‘Only if you play me something on the drums.’  
sent12:37 p.m.

Tyler smiled contently as he shut off and set his phone on the table and sat against the booth. He’s back was sore as hell and he needed at least another few hours of sleep to get through the rest of work. He rubbed his eyes and yawned at the mere image of him curled up in bed, his soft comforter wrapped around him along with an arm, a face tucked into the space between his neck and shoulder. Tyler imagined yellow dyed hair spilling over onto his face and the warmth surrounding him that radiated from another body in his bed. 

Tyler was snapped from his thoughts when a voice from real life entered his ear and into his mind. “What may I get for you today, sir?”

“Uh, just a burger and side of fries, please.” 

l-/

“Are you sure you don’t want to come? We’re going putt-putting after. It’ll be really funnnnn!” Jenna offered again for at least the seventh time in the last hour.

“I’m sure, plus I have to work the late shift. I have plans later anyways, I’ll be fine.” Tyler gave a reassuring smile and waved Jenna off. Once the blonde was out of sight Tyler slumped over the candy counter and let out a groan. Tonight was going to be a long night. He had to stay around for the midnight showing of yet another “Scream” showing and as long as he cleaned the lobby and restrooms during the showing he would be able to meet up with Josh by one. 

Tyler let out a stressed sigh as he got out his phone and began to type rapidly.

‘Hey, boss put me on the late shift. I might not be able to show until 1, that okay?’  
sent 10:09 p.m.

Tyler turned his phone on the lowest ringer setting and shoved it into his pocket again before his boss came out and busted him. Again. There were no words for just how badly Tyler wanted to quit his job.

“Hello, what may I get you tonight?” Tyler asked as a line began to form in front of him. He had hardly realized it as he was lost in imagining strangling his boss with the stupid wire that connected the telephone in his office to the wall. 

“Uh, how is the popcorn?” The stranger in front of Tyler asked, his hands placed dangerously close to Tyler’s. 

“Corny. Would you like a bucket?” Tyler asked deadpan, his eyes focusing on the stranger's features as if he recognized him from somewhere.

“Small, please.” The stranger licked his lips and bounced back onto his heels. Tyler simply nodded and got the stranger his popcorn and set it on the counter. 

“That’ll be three seventy-five, please.” Tyler spoke as he began to punch in numbers to the overly old cash register. He supposed it added character to this awful place. 

“Actually, uh, can I also get some skittles?” The guy requested, licking his lips again. Tyler muttered a sure and ducked down to grab the candy before setting it onto the counter. 

“Okay, your total is six dollars even.” Tyler huffed out and looked at the stranger before he started licking his damn lips again. ‘What the hell is up with this guy?’ Tyler questioned himself before the guy spoke up again.

“Actually, I uh, haha..” The guy patted his front and back pockets. “I must’ve forgotten my wallet, what do ya say I pay you out in the alley after your shift ends, huh?” 

An immediate feeling of disgust and fright rolled throughout Tyler’s entire being as he stepped back from the register. “Sir, we only-” Tyler closed his eyes and swallowed. “We can only a=take cash or credit. N-nothing else.” 

“C’mon, I know ya want me as much as-” 

“No.” Tyler stated sternly. “Sir, I’m going to have to ask you to either leave to your show or pay for your food.” Tyler let out a shaky breath from his nose, his eyes closing for a brief second before looking the man in the eye again.

“Fucking tease.” The man muttered and threw a ten onto the counter as he picked up his food. Tyler picked up the money with a shaking hand and placed it into the register before dealing with the next person in line.

Tyler felt like any second he would throw up all over the counter he had just finished disinfecting an hour ago. He just wanted this night to be over.

l-/

When Tyler was finally done with the giant line of hungry patrons he heard his muffled phone chime, alerting him that he had received a text. He could only hope of who was behind the electronic message.

‘Why don’t I just pick you up after your shift ends?’  
received 11:20 p.m. ‘It ends in twenty minutes.’  
sent 11:21 p.m.

‘Cool, I’ll be there in twenty then. (-;’  
received11:21 p.m.

Tyler couldn’t help but smile and roll his eyes at Josh's use of emoticon. God, Josh was such a dork. He could almost make Tyler forget all about the dick that harassed him tonight. Almost. Tyler texted Josh the address and waited with his back pressed against the wall behind the candy bar. Mark was supposed to be here just after he left to cover the next shift and Brendon was in the other section of the small theater, so leaving before Mark arrived wouldn’t be too much of a problem. Tyler turned his ringer up and shoved his phone back into his pocket. 

Tyler ran a hand through his short hair and let out a short breath as he tried to focus on doing something productive while he waited for Josh to come and steal him away from his crappy job. Tyler looked around the theater and tapped his foot anxiously as he imagined throwing his resignation letter in his boss’s face and running away from this godforsaken town. The town that had kicked him while he was down, the town that had wronged him more times than right, the town that betrayed him more than his parents had, the town that Joshua Dun lived in, the town that gave Tyler Joseph the best night of his life, the town that housed that housed the little bar that gave Tyler the chance to meet Josh.

Maybe, just maybe, the town that Tyler hates more than anything, isn’t so bad.

l-/

Tyler threw his jacket over his shoulder and messenger bag over the other as he pushed open the glass doors that led out of the theater. He sighed a happy and relieved sigh as he saw Josh’s car begin to roll down the street. Tyler smiled and waved down his.. Friend? What were they? Just yesterday they were strangers and Tyler was calling Josh ‘The Miscellaneous Man’ in his head. Weird.

“Excuse me, sir?” Josh asked as he began to roll down his passenger side window and peer out of it and began to look up and down the street. “Do you know where I can find a cute guy, about six foot, wearing a bow tie and a very attractive smile?” 

Tyler rolled his eyes and laughed, his hands gripping onto the strap of his messenger bag that much tighter. “You’re such a dork, I swear.” Tyler shook his head and climbed into Josh’s small car and buckled in.

“I try,” Josh smiled as they began down the street. “How was work?” The yellow-haired man asked, his thumbs tapping the steering wheel to the beat of the song playing over the radio. 

“My boss yelled at me, again.” ‘Are you going to tell mommy all about your problems?’ “I guess it was alright.” Tyler sighed, slumping back into the cold seat. 

“Hm,” Josh looked back and forth between Tyler and the road, his thumbs now tapping faster against the wheel. “Is that all that happened?”

“What do you mean?” Tyler asked with a huff.

“It just seems that you’re a little more upset for just being yelled at.” Josh shrugged.

“My boss is a dick.” Tyler hissed. “I’m irritated.”

“Look, Tyler I get it, I do, But it just seems like-” 

“Just take me home.”

“What?” Josh squinted in confusion.

“I said, take me home.” Tyler crossed his arms and stared out of the window, his eyes watching the darkened trees as they flew by.

“Tyler, I’m so-” Josh began, confused as to why Tyler was so upset.

“Just stop. Please, just pull over.” Tyler sounded weaker now, all the venom drained from his quiet voice.

“Tyler, it’s midnight- you don’t know who’s out there.” Josh pointed out, shaking his head in protest.

“I said pull over. Now, Joshua.” Tyler sat up, already unbuckling his seatbelt.

With a frustrated huff, Josh pulled over. The two were silent as Tyler collected his things and stepped out of Josh’s car, slamming the door just a little too hard. Tyler felt a pit open in his stomach as he began walking from the dark red car. Tyler chuckled to himself, hot tears threatening to spill onto his freezing cheeks. He wrapped both arms around himself, trying to create some sort of warmth. ‘Just another relationship you’ve managed to fuck up. How many is that now?’ The voice in the back of his mind spoke in a dark- almost playful whisper. Tyler sucked in a breath from his nose and looked back to find that Josh’s car was still in the same spot it was in when Tyler began walking. He was almost tempted to run back, apologize for what happened- beg for Josh to forgive him. Tyler shook his head and continued walking until his feet were numb.


	3. Worth It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not a lot of Josh in this chapter. We kind of dive into more of Tyler's problems and Brendon is there to help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm worried that you can't really differentiate Blurry from Tyler's thoughts. Maybe give me some ideas on how to really make Blurry's parts pop. Constructive criticism is always appreciated.

It took Tyler about an hour and a half to get back to his car out front of the theater and by then all the lights inside seemed to be off, leaving Tyler blindly hitting his keys against the drivers door. He groaned in frustration and shoved his head into his arms and let his body lean against the hood of his car. 

‘You just can’t do anything right tonight.’

 

“Stop- please,” Tyler pleaded, his voice cracking slightly. “Not now.”

‘First you let that man touch you- violate you, then you let some man talk to you like the little whore you are, and now you fucked up the only decent relationship you had left. No wonder your parents didn’t want you.’

“Get out of my head!” Tyler yelled, pulling at the short hair that had just recently started growing back. “Leave me the hell alone!” Tyler kicked his front tire with all the strength he could muster. 

‘Now look what you did. I could almost pitty you.’

Tyler cried out and gripped his foot, doubling over in pain on the cocrete by his car. It wasn’t long before hot tears were pouring down his face. He could die here. He wanted to die here. He wanted Josh to be beside him. He wanted Josh to be playing the drums for him right now. He wanted to be loved.

“Bad night?” Tyler heard a familiar voice ask from the other side of his car. 

“Bad night.” Tyler confirmed in a painful sob.

The sound of footsteps walking towards him came next and all Tyler could do was lay there on the freezing cement, clutching his foot in pain. Maybe it was broken. Maybe Tyler could spend the night with strangers in the hospital than alone at home. That would be nice. 

“C’mon, let’s get you up, huh?” The sound of a cigarette dropping somewhere near him came before careful hands and the feeling of cold air hitting his back rather than freezing cement. “I thought you were having a schizophrenic episode or something.” 

‘He already thinks you’re insane.’

Tyler grimaced at the choice of word and let himself be leaned against his car. “Thanks, Brendon.” He mumbled and let out a pained breath through his nose.

“No problem,” Brendon patted Tyler on the shoulder and seemed to look Tyler up and down, hopefully just scanning him for injuries. “Maybe I should drive you to the hospital, y’know me, always hate to see a coworker upset.”

“No offense, but that sounds like the opposite of you.” Tyler grumbled, his eyes watching the road as if Josh would come speeding down it any second now. “But, I’m pretty sure I need to go to the hospital.” Tyler admitted with a sigh.

“Do you need help getting the the-?” Brendon asked with a cautious step forward.

Tyler just nodded and lifted his arms up so that he could wrap them around his co-worker for extra support while they walked around the front of his car. Brendon helped open up the passenger side, taking a moment to get his phone’s flashlight out before putting Tyler’s key into the door. Tyler internally swore at his stupidity.

“So, do you want to explain as to what happened back there?” Brendon asked, tapping on the steering wheel. The action made Tyler’s stomach flip uncomfortably. 

“No.” Tyler stated simply, crossing his arms over his chest and swearing to himself at the sudden flash of pain that zipped through his body when they hit a pothole. 

“Are you sure?” Brendon asked. Tyler didn’t answer.

l-/

“Mr. Joseph, I’d say it’s good to see you, but not quite under these circumstances.” Tyler wondered how many times in a day his doctor used that joke.

Tyler faked a smile and sat back onto his hands as he tried to resist the urge to swing his legs off of the examining table. The last thing he wanted was to cause his foot more pain. 

“So, doc,” Brendon began, his eyes trained on the pen in his hand that he had stolen from the secretary's desk. “Give it to me straight. Is it broken?”

“Brendon.” Tyler hissed, his eyes staring daggers at the other man that seemed to do nothing but entertain him. 

“I was just getting to that,” The doctor paused, looking over the chart that sat in his left hand. Tyler nervously tapped his thumbs together, his eyes shifting from the movement in his hands to his almost purple foot. The sight made his stomach churn. “The good news is that your foot is not broken, Mr. Joseph.” Tyler internally sighed with relief. “But the bad news is that you did end up earning yourself a hairline fracture in your ankle and will need to wear a temporary cast for the next four to six weeks.” 

Tyler groaned and slumped over himself. He barely had enough money for this hospital visit alone, how the hell was he going to pay for a cast and follow up visits? Stupid, stupid Tyler. “Is there any way I could heal my ankle without a cast?” Tyler rubbed between his eyes and let out a strained breath through his nose. 

“I’m afraid not without surgery.” The doctor informed his, pressing the clipboard to his chest. “I’ll give you a few moments to decide.” The doctor spoke softly and then the sound of a door opening and shutting echoed throughout the room.

“Fuck..” Tyler muttered into his hands. He was royally screwed. He was going to lose his job, then his apartment, he already lost Josh- he was going to have nothing in a matter of days. Tyler was snapped back from his thoughts as a pair of warm hands gently settled on his back in a comforting matter. “Dude, I’m going to be so fucking broke..” Tyler vented, his voice muffled by his own hands.

“I’m sure that between me and Mark- we can cover your shift.” Brendon comforted, his weight shifting the paper laying over the examining table.

“No- no, Brendon- I hardly know you I couldn-” 

“Would I have driven you here tonight if I weren’t willing?”

“I mean, maybe I’ve never-”

“No, no I wouldn’t.” Brendon chuckled and patted Tyler’s back. “I’ll just tell Mark that he got put on the late shift for the next week for breaking the slushie machine.”

“Brendon. You did that.” Tyler looked up from his hands to see a grinning Brendon above him.

“What Mark doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” Brendon smiled warmly and Tyler couldn’t help but do the same.

“Thank you.”

l-/

Tyler ended up going with the cast as he did not want to spend the next five weeks in a cold hospital bed with nothing to do but watch the same news channel for eight hours straight. Apparently, someone stole the remote. Great.

Tyler blinked tiredly as he laid in the stiff bed, his vision slowly going blurry as he looked around the room. Brendon had gone home hours ago, promising to bring Tyler’s car back when he came back the next day after Tyler had gotten his cast on. 

A pained groan escaped the man's lips as he stretched his limbs to grab his phone off of the bedside table. After a small handful of failed attempts and mumbled curses, Tyler was able to grab his phone and turn it on to- ah. The signature dead battery screen with the sad battery pack in front of the black screen. Tyler rolled his eyes and set his phone beside him in the bed. Good thing his only working charger was in the glove compartment of his car. Tyler sighed and couldn’t help but feel anxious as he thought of all the possible things Josh could have texted him over the seven hours Tyler has been M.I.A. 

I hate you.

Don’t contact me again.

Prude.

You’re so selfish.

Drama whore.

Can’t you do anything right?

Or maybe Josh hadn’t texted Tyler at all since he ran from the colorful man’s car. Tyler decided that that would be the most devastating. He fell asleep to the thoughts of what could have been between him and Josh.

l-/

“Mr. Joseph?” A soft voice brought Tyler back to reality. Tyler groaned as he pushed himself up into a sitting position. “It’s good to see you awake again.” 

Tyler hummed in response, his eyes blinking tiredly as the memories from last night faded back and he suddenly remembered why he was here. In the hospital.

“Now, I’ll give you a few minutes to wake up before we put the cast on.” The doctor looked back down at his clipboard, eyes scanning over information briefly before meeting Tyler’s. “Do you have any questions before I go?” 

Tyler blinked again, this time keeping his eyes closed for a moment. “I- uh,” Tyler cleared his throat. “Do you have a phone I could use?” 

The doctor smiled and nodded, gesturing to the phone on the far side of the bedside table. “Just press one and pound before dialing the number.” 

Tyler thanked his doctor and began reaching for the phone as the sound of a door closing sounding throughout the small hospital room. “C’mon, just a little farther-” Tyler mumbled, stretching his arm as far as it could go without moving his foot. “Yes, c’mon-” Tyler smiled a little as he got a grasp of the top of the phone, his phone brushing lightly against the cold plastic. The feeling made Tyler think about the feeling of the grainy cement scraping against his back as he fell onto the road. He shook his head with his eyes shut and gripped tightly onto the warming plastic. 

The pale man sighed as he began to dial the first number that came to mind. 

 

Rinnggg

Rinnggg

Rinnggg

Rinnggg

‘Hey there, you’ve reached my voicemail. You know what to do.’

Tyler was internally glad that he got the voicemail. “Hey, uh, Josh- It’s Tyler..” Tyler swallowed quietly, his eyes shut as he tried to think of anything meaningful to say. “I’m sorry about last night.. Just, uh.” Tyler stuttered. “Just please, give me a chance to explain. I’m really sorry.” 

Tyler dropped the phone onto his lap and laid his head against the hard pillow with a stressed breath. He was not built for things like this. 

l-/

“Alrighty, looks like we’re all done here, Mr. Joseph. Until we can get you a pair of crutches, you’ll have to stay off of your feet. That means until further notice, Mr. Joseph, you are on bed rest.” 

Tyler groaned quietly, rolling his eyes under his closed eyelids. He did not look forward to sitting around his house all hours of the day until ‘further notice’. Augh.

“You ready to go, Ty?” Brendon asked, spinning Tyler’s car keys on his pointer finger. “Woah, look at you! New cast! Is that Gucci brand?” 

“I’m ready.” tyler groaned, rolling his eyes as Brendon spoke.

“I mean it, Mr. Joseph. I don’t want you to have to stay in that thing any longer than necessary.” His doctor pointed his ball point at Tyler’s cast. “I’ll see you at our next appointment. Hopefully you have no more breaks or fractures by then.” 

Tyler fake smiled and muttered a thank you as Brendon helped to lift him off of the examining table. “Should I carry you bridal style?” Brendon asked, wiggling his eyebrows up and down.  
Tyler fake gagged and lifted his arm around Brendon's shoulder as he began to stand slowly, easing his weight onto his good leg. “You wish.” He mumbled as the two began their long journey through the hospital halls and to the only two elevators in the entire building. Tyler was pretty sure that he got groped by a stranger in the ride down, either that or it was Brendon. Both choices made Tyler actually want to throw up.

l-/

“What the hell did you do to my radio?” Tyler asked, his mouth gaping as he stared blankly at the ugly speaker dock sitting above his perfectly good radio, colorful wires sticking out of the front of the side of the almost torn off screen that once protected the innards of Tyler’s car radio.

“Oh. Yeah. I was hoping that you wouldn’t.. Notice..” Brendon explained, putting Tyler’s car into drive before pulling away rather quickly, sending Tyler grasping for the dashboard before frantically buckling his seatbelt. 

“Jesus Ch- Dude, you’re so paying for a new radio- how did you even manage that!?” Tyler was yelling, he knew he was probably overreacting- but he was just so angry. 

“Dude, calm down I’ll fix it, okay!” Brendon gripped the steering wheel, a dry chuckle escaping his throat.

“Calm down!? Calm down!? Are you fuc- Are you serious, Brendon?” Tyler’s hand gripped and ungripped tightly.

‘That’s it, Ty. Let it out. Hit him, c’mon y’know you want to.’ The voice in the back of Tyler’s head spoke up again, he could almost hear the smirk in his voice.

“Shut up.” Tyler croaked, his hand gripping tightly onto the grab handle above his head as his eyes snapped shut. 

“Dude, I didn’t say anything.” Brendon huffed out breathlessly. Tyler could feel frightened eyes scanning over him. “What’s go on with you?”

“Nothing, I’m fine.” Tyler lied, his hand white-knuckling as he continued to grip tighter and tighter and tighter and..

“Dude, stop- you’re going to break the ‘Oh Shit’ bar or your hand.” Brendon looked back and forth between Tyler and the road, his mind trying to decide on whether or not he wanted to pull over. He tapped his thumbs heavily against the wheel. 

“Stop the car, please- I think I’m going to be sick.” Tyler begged weakly, his stomach practically was doing backflips as he spoke and he didn’t know how much more he could handle before he- 

Brendon practically swerved over to the side of the road before Tyler could say (or do) anything else. 

Tyler unbuckled his seatbelt as fast as he could and leaned onto the door as he opened it, causing himself to fall from the car and onto the side of the road. He groaned in pain as he hit the sidewalk face first, his cast getting caught in between the seat and door. Tyler huffed in a breath, another, another, and another until he couldn’t handle it any longer. He pushed himself up by his bony arms and hurled his stomach's contents onto the street and watched as the bland contents ran down the sidewalk. 

Tyler swallowed and wiped his mouth with his wrist, his breathing slowed and he felt as if he were on the edge of a panic attack. Great. 

“Ty..” Brendon began, kneeling down to level Tyler’s top half with his bottom one.

“Don’t call me that.” Tyler’s voice cracked.

“Okay..” Brendon began, running his fingers through Tyler’s short hair. “Do you want to talk about it?” 

“I push away everyone that comes even remotely close.” Tyler stated, his stomach flipping back and forth. “I can’t do anything right.”

‘Looks like you’re finally coming to your senses.’

“I hear voices- a voice in my head that tells me to do bad things and I can’t stop him.” Tyler admitted. “Sometimes I listen.” 

“Have you ever thought about seeing a therapist?” Brendon asked, his hand briefly slowing.

Tyler scoffed slightly and shook his head. “Tried it.” He states. “Doesn’t work.”

“Self-medication?” Tyler couldn’t tell if it was a joke or not. He just shook his head in Brendon’s hands.

“Do you want to talk about last night?”

“No.” Tyler spoke in a broken voice. “Not now.”

“Okay.”

l-/

Tyler and Brendon sat there, in the street for an hour, at least. People walking by would give the two weird looks as if they were circus performers, but hey, they might as well have been, right? Tyler did feel a little weird on dumping some of his issues onto Brendon like he did, considering that he was almost a complete stranger. 

Brendon promised to keep Tyler’s problems under wraps as long as he resolved whatever issues Tyler had been dealing with last night when Brendon found him. Tyler said that he would do his best. That seemed to be enough for the other man. 

After Brendon had helped Tyler back into the car, the two drove back to Tyler’s apartment in silence, nothing but the sound of wind hitting the glass that protected them from the outside world. Tyler felt.. Alright.

When they arrived at the small building Brendon assisted Tyler in getting to his apartment after debating with Tyler on whether or not a crippled man should be allowed to walk up four flights of stairs by himself. The elevator in the building was currently broken.

After a few exchanged words and numbers, Tyler was left alone again. Only this time he sat on his cheap leather couch and watched the black tv. He couldn’t afford to pay the cable bill this month.

The pale man sighed disappointedly and leaned over to the plug where his old, barely functioning charger stood plugged in and pushed the end into his phone. He silently hoped that Josh would have texted or called by now. He would have a lot of explaining to do. 

It would be worth it.


	4. Send Him In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The beginning is a little graphic, apologies. It involves non-con themes, skip over that part if you can't handle that.  
> We see through Brendon's eyes for a while and Josh kind of makes an appearance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks to JustAnotherFlightlessBird for helping me get out of my writer's block and finally getting this chapter up! Again, warnings for Non-Con themes at the beginning and a few mentions of suicidal thoughts/self-harm. Feedback is always appreciated! Stay safe <3

“Stop- stop, please!” Tyler pleaded through thick sobs as his face was being scraped against the damp cement, a callused hand holding it there as the sound of something unbuckling sounded throughout the dark alley.

“This’ll be a whole lot easier if you’d just stop struggling.” The man above him hissed, yanking harshly onto Tyler’s thin hair, causing the young man to yelp out in pain.

“Please- no, stop- I won’t tell anyone just- please-” Tyler let out a louder yelp as the man pulled again, this time drawing blood. 

“Shut your mouth, boy. I won’t ask again.” The older man slurred above Tyler. He sobbed silently, hot tears falling from his eyes and onto the already wet cement. 

Tyler remained silent as he felt the same calloused hand that pulled oh so harshly on his hair, pull down his favorite pair of jeans. Tyler opened his mouth- he wanted to plead the man to stop- to let Tyler go, he would never speak of this to anyone, he promised- but nothing dared to escape his lips. It was in that moment, that Tyler truly wanted to die.

l-/

Tyler woke to the sun beaming in from in between his beige blinds hitting him directly in the eyes. He blinked one, twice, and groaned as he turned away from his window. His mind raced with thoughts from yesterday- the man at the candy counter, the look of sadness on Josh’s face as Tyler left him, the pain that shot through Tyler’s foot as he kicked that stupid wheel. He felt like curling in on himself and crying himself back to sleep. It’s not like he had any other option. He was on bedrest indefinitely.

 

‘You could swallow all of the pills in your medicine cabinet.’

Tyler groaned, choosing to ignore the voice in his head. He wasn’t in the mood for an argument as of now. Tyler’s eyes scanned his apartment for any sign of anyone else having been there while he was asleep. Brendon was supposed to drop off his prescription and food after work. Either Brendon forgot about him, or the clock on the wall was still broken.

It wasn’t until Tyler shifted his weight onto his other side that he realized the weight of his bladder. He groaned, not wanting to deal with getting to the bathroom by himself, but it didn’t seem that he had any other option at the moment. He let his head fall against the back of the couch for a moment as he mentally prepared himself for getting up before pushing his torso into an upright position. “Okay, we’re off to a good start..” Tyler breathed out quietly before lightly lifting his casted foot off of the coffee table and onto the floor. He sucked in a soft breath as a tiny pin of pain ran up Tyler’s leg. It could definitely be worse.

Tyler sat on the edge of the couch, his hands positioned on top of the small wooden coffee table and pushed. He shifted his weight completely onto his opposite leg and began waddling through the kitchen, balancing himself on the counters and tables as he passed through. There were a few moments where Tyler had to stop to give his leg a break, but it was relatively easy to get from the living room to the bathroom for someone with a cast.

Tyler sighed with relief as he flushed the toilet. He couldn’t recall a single time when his bladder felt so full. Tyler wobbled over to the sink and began washing his hands with steaming water.  
Tyler glanced at himself in the mirror as he slotted his hands back and forth a little harshly. He looked worse than he felt, which was truly saying something. He had enormous bags under his darker than usual brown eyes and there seemed to be bruises blossoming under his too pale skin. With a slight turn of the head he could see his greasy hair matted together in the back. He looked repulsing.

Without looking from the mirror, Tyler turned off the nearly boiling water and balanced himself against the porcelain. “What-?” Tyler asked, lifting a hand from the sink as he watched the water drip from his pale skin and into the large puddle on the counter top. He looked down into the sink to see that he left the drain closed for it to flood. Good job, Tyler.

Tyler sighed and twisted around to grab a towel and just as his hand brushes against a still damp towel, his foot makes contact with a small puddle of water that had pooled on the floor, causing his feet to come out from under him. Tyler’s heart rate quickens, and he grips onto the counter to keep from hitting the ground. His feet then somehow slip on the water again and Tyler flips around, falling backwards onto the tile flooring. 

“Jesus Christ-” Tyler gasped, desperately trying to catch his breath. His lungs felt as if they were on fire and there was a shooting pain from his foot up. Before he knew it, there were hot tears escaping his eyes and, even though he had caught his breath, he was still gasping for air. 

 

‘You’re weak.’

“I’m not weak..” Tyler sobbed, clutching his side.

‘You’re pathetic.’

“I’m not pathetic..” Tyler squeezed his eyes shut, trying to push off the voice in the back of his head.

‘You’d be better off dead.’

“I’d be better off dead.” 

l-/

 

Brendon carried the bag with Tyler’s prescription in his left hand and the bag with trash food in his mouth as he reached into his jean pocket for the key to Tyler’s apartment. Brendon had gotten off from work a few hours ago, but got stuck in traffic on the way to CVS for Tyler’s prescription, and of course the drive-thru line for Taco Bell had to be at least forty-five minutes. He hoped that Tyler hadn’t died of starvation while waiting for Brendon.

Brendon hummed triumphantly as he felt the small key at the bottom of his pocket, hiding under the numerous receipts he hid in there. He slotted the key into the lock, twisting it before kicking the door open with his foot. “Joseph, I got you a disgusting amount of tacos!” Brendon called out, his voice slightly muffled by the bag in his mouth. 

He walked into the apartment, closing the door behind him. “Tyler?” Brendon called, dropping the bag into his hand and walking into the living room, only to find it empty, only a Tyler shaped indent in his couch. “Tyler? You here?” How far could a scrawny guy in crutches like Tyler get, anyway? 

Brendon glanced around the small apartment, looking for any sign of where Tyler could have gone. He hummed in confusion as he set the bag of taco’s down on the coffee table. Brendon ran a hand through his thick hair, letting out a small sigh as he took a step back, glancing down the hallway leading out of the living room before beginning to walk down it, looking into the first room that seemed to be Tyler’s bedroom. The bed was a mess and it was filled with all kinds of dust, but other than that it seemed to be empty of life. 

The next door was closed and as Brendon neared closer, there seemed to be water leaking out from under the door. “Joseph? I’m coming in, okay?” Brendon could’ve swore that he heard a voice on the other side of the door. With a quick breath and a little mental preparation for what could be on the other side of the door, Brendon pushed it open. 

“Fuck, Tyler- what the hell did you do?” Brendon asked, kneeling down into the cold puddle that enveloped Tyler on the tile. “Christ, dude.” 

“I’d be better off dead, I’d be better off dead, I’d be better off dead. I’d be better off dead.” Tyler kept repeating the same sentence over and over, his eyes focused off somewhere else. It was like he didn’t even hear Brendon talking to him.

“Tyler, you can’t say things like that, buddy.” Brendon spoke softly as he began to wrap Tyler’s cold body in his arms, shifting so that the other man’s head was placed delicately on Brendon’s thigh. He would need to check Tyler for a concussion later. 

“I want to die, please- I want to-” Tyler began sobbing, his cold hands gripping tightly onto Brendon’s arm.  
“Shh..” Brendon began combing his fingers lightly through Tyler’s half damp hair, trying to soothe the other man. “Did you take anything, Tyler? Did you harm yourself?”

Tyler shook his head.

Brendon nodded with a hum. “What do you say we get you off of the floor, huh?” 

Tyler nodded, hot tears still falling from his face and into the puddle on the floor. Brendon hummed again, lightly positioning the other man into an upwards position as he stood carefully. He swallowed as he tried to assess the situation to the best of his ability. Well, there went his plans of getting laid tonight.

l-/

 

“We should talk about what happened in there.” Brendon announced as he came back into the room after mopping up the mess in the bathroom and bagging any medicine that could be lethal.

“Should we?” Tyler replied dryly, his hair still damp from the incident.

“Yes, we should. And about last night.” 

“What’s there to talk about?” Tyler asked, laying back into the couch.

“You tell me.” Brendon quipped.

“Fine.” It wasn’t like Brendon could judge him any further. He already knew about the voice in Tyler’s head. “I-I met this guy, Josh- he was really nice- he took me to Taco Bell and we ate on the roof and I really, really liked him-”

“Did he cheat on you?” Brendon cut Tyler off, his eyebrow quirked up.

“No- God, no. I just- I’m bad for him. I don’t trust people, I have no sense of humor- I just- I can’t behave like a human being. I blew up on him yesterday because some asshole harassed me at the candy counter- he just wanted to know how my day was!” Tyler placed his head in his hands. “He cared and I pushed him away.”

“Is that it?” Brendon asked. “Is that why you want to..”

“I- I don’t know.” Tyler half-lied.

“Anything you tell me won’t leave this room, Tyler.” Brendon comforted. “Out there I’ll go back to my asshole self, but you can tell me anything here.” 

“I- I was..” Tyler’s throat began to close and he could feel tears begin to well up in his eyes. “I can’t. I’m sorry, I can’t.” 

“It’s fine.” Brendon smiled for a few seconds. “At your own pace, yeah?”

l-/

Brendon helped Tyler into his bedroom after their conversation, the bag of uneaten tacos going into the fridge for the night. As Tyler tried to get comfortable Brendon brought him a glass of water, a pain killer, and his fully charged phone that he had been purposely neglected for the day.

“Holler if you need something,” Brendon smiled. “I’ll just be in the living room.”

“Dude, you sound like a mom.” Tyler laughed. “Thanks, though.”

With a chuckle and a ‘no problem, man’ Brendon left the room, shutting off the light behind him. Tyler’s smile faded as he was left alone to his thoughts. He wanted so desperately to check his phone for a single text, even though his stomach dropped at the mere thought. He didn’t know what would be worse, a nasty text from Josh or no text at all. 

Tyler shook his head and swallowed the decent sized painkiller with a small drink of water. There was no way that he was going to get any sleep with the pain shooting up from his foot. He guessed the doctor knew what he was talking about when he said that Tyler needed to be on bedrest while waiting for his crutches to arrive.

Tyler glanced over to the bedside table where his phone sat facedown, calling for Tyler to turn it on and see whatever messages waited for him. “Fuck it.” Tyler spoke into the darkness, his pale arm reaching for his phone and bringing it back to his face. He slowly counted to three before turning it on. 

 

You’re in the hospital!?  
Received yesterday

Did you hurt yourself??  
Received yesterday.

Tyler Joseph, answer me.  
Received yesterday. 

Call me.  
Received yesterday.

Please. Call me.  
Received yesterday.

‘6 Missed calls from Josh’

Tyler could feel the tears well up in his eyes already. Without thinking, he dialed Josh’s number and pushed his phone up to his ear.

It took two rings for Josh to pick up.

“Tyler!?” Josh’s voice was groggy and filled with worry. Tyler’s heart skipped a beat.

“Josh, I’m sorry-”

“Are you okay?” Josh cut Tyler off, the noise of him sitting up was barely picked up by his phone's speaker.

“Other than a fractured foot, yes, I’m fine.” If Josh meant physically, then what Tyler was saying was true.

“How the hell- how did you manage that!?” Josh’s voice sounded like a mixture of worry and anger. 

“It’s a long story…” Tyler chuckled dryly, biting his lips as he began thinking more and more about the night before.

“I’m coming over.” The other man declared, the sound of bedsheets shuffling in the background.

“Josh, you have work in the morning- you don’t even know my address.” Tyler tried to reason.

“I can take the day off.” Josh spoke quickly. “Send me your address.” 

The line went dead after that and Tyler could only assume that meant that Josh had hung up before Tyler could protest any further. Tyler wanted to see Josh. desperately- but not like this. He was disgusting. His hair was greasy and damp, he had bruises forming everywhere, and he could hardly move by himself. He wanted to scream into a pillow right about now.

Reluctantly, Tyler gave in and typed out his address and sent it to Josh, letting his phone fall onto his chest. He wasn’t ready for this, but he owed Josh at least this. 

“Brendon!” Tyler called out, waiting a few seconds before the sound of feet hitting the wooden floor sounding down the hall.

“Yeah, what’s up?” Brendon asked groggily. 

“Josh is coming over…” Tyler spoke quietly.

“Josh, Josh?” Brendon asked, leaning against the door frame. 

“Yeah..” Tyler swallowed, looking up at the ceiling.

“And you’re nervous?” 

“Yeah, I really don’t want him to see me like this.” Tyler admitted.

“Do you want me to help you get yourself together?” Brendon asked with a yawn.

“Please.” 

Brendon nodded. “We can wash your hair in the sink.” He spoke with a hum as he approached Tyler, helping the other man up and assisting him in their journey to the kitchen. Brendon instructed Tyler to put his head into the kitchen sink and keep all of his weight on his opposite leg. Tyler simply nodded and closed his eyes as the hot water poured over his head, eventually seeping into his hair long enough for Brendon to apply the shampoo. 

Tyler opened his eyes halfway through Brendon rinsing Tyler’s hair of the shampoo and watched as the suds ran to the drain. Something about it.. Interested him. Tyler didn’t put too much thought into it as Brendon’s hands lightly massaged the soap from Tyler’s head before spreading the conditioner around in Tyler’s brown locks. Tyler didn’t respond as Brendon said something about Tyler making a grocery list so that Brendon could go shopping after Josh left. 

Soon, the water that hit the back of Tyler’s head stopped and he was being smothered by a soft towel as Brendon began drying off Tyler’s short hair. “What next?” Brendon asked, wrapping the towel around Tyler’s head. 

“I want to change my shirt, but I can do that by myself.” Tyler announced, still staring at the sink.

“Is that it?”

“Unless you can get rid of these bruises,” Tyler gestured to his face. “I don’t think so.”

Brendon hummed and nodded, wrapping an arm around Tyler as he led the other man back to his bedroom to get changed. Tyler thanked Brendon for his help and waited for Brendon to leave before shutting his bedroom door and wobbling over to his dresser. He grabbed his cotton grey hoodie that he had only worn a few times prior and wobbled back over to the body mirror that hung next to his rarely used closet. Tyler sighed as he pulled his t-shirt over his head, exposing his pale chest to air for the first time in two days. Tyler stared at his ugly reflection in the mirror, his eyes trained in disgust at the ugly scars that littered his sides as if they would somehow go away. Some were months old and some were days old. It wasn’t hard to tell which from which. Tyler clutched onto the soft grey hoodie for a moment as he watched his side's expand as he breathed in and out before pulling on the hoodie and adjusting it to his liking. 

It was then that Tyler heard a heavy knock come from the living room, indicating that Josh was there. Tyler breathed in and wobbled over to his bed and laid down as he heard Brendon’s voice greet Josh at the door. 

Panic finally set in.

What if Josh yelled at him? What if Josh hated Tyler? Tyler would hate Tyler. Tyler did hate Tyler.  
Tyler’s chest rose rapidly as he felt a panic attack come on. He had to control his breathing, focus on something else. Anything else.

Two pairs of footsteps sounded down the hall and Tyler just wanted to disappear. He wanted to be anywhere else than here.

“Let me just check to make sure he’s okay.” He heard Brendon say and then his door was being opened and Brendon was slipping in. 

“Are you ready to see him?” Brendon asked.

“No.” Tyler answered.

“Do you want me to send him away? Tell him you’re not comfortable?”

“No. I want to see him- just, what if he hates me?” Tyler ran his hands through his still damp hair. 

“He doesn’t hate you, Tyler.” Brendon comforted.

“How do you know?” Tyler asked in a confused tone.

“If there’s one thing I know, it’s when somebody hates another person. Trust me.”

Tyler slowly nodded, shuffling his hands together. It was a few seconds of silence and last minute thoughts before Tyler spoke again. “Send him in.”


	5. Migraine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler explains to Josh what exactly happened that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A shorter chapter, I'll admit. Some lighter, happier things ensue. Stay safe <3

“Send him in.” Tyler spoke, swallowing the small lump forming in his throat. 

“Are you sure?” Tyler heard Brendon ask. Was he sure? Tyler internally scoffed. Of course he wasn’t sure, what kind of stupid question was that? Tyler wasn’t foolish enough to think that he would be mentally prepared to see Josh in the next few minutes. Hell, anytime within the next year would be too much. 

“As sure as I’ll ever be.” Tyler flashed a broken, crooked smile at Brendon before the other man nodded and slipped back out Tyler’s door. There was a brief sound of hushed whispers and a Tyler’s own shaky breath before the door that divided Tyler from any other human-being was being pushed open. 

The lump was back.

“I- uh, I-” Tyler sputtered.

“Jesus, Tyler..” Josh ran both of his hands through his bright yellow locks as he began stepping towards Tyler’s stiff body that sat upright on his bed. “What the hell did you do?” Josh spoke quietly, kneeling down beside the bed.

“I-” Tyler took a breath in. “I kicked the side of my car- hard. I was just upset, I overreacted- I don’t know what I was-”

“Hey, hey.. Breathe, okay?” Josh suggested, a nervous smile laying over his lips.

Tyler nodded, taking a few breaths in as he watched the wall just behind the other man’s head. “I didn’t mean to worry you, it’s really nothing.”

“You had to go to the hospital, Tyler.” Josh pointed out. Tyler opened his mouth to say something, but quickly closed it as he realised he had nothing to say. “My point exactly.”

Josh stood, his hand lingering on the side of Tyler’s bed as if he was asking permission for something. Tyler nodded weakly and Josh lifted one leg onto the mattress and pulled himself up onto the large mattress, carefully adjusting himself so that he wouldn’t accidentally hurt Tyler’s leg.

“Can we talk about what happened?” Josh asked almost as if he were scared to bring up the topic. “If you don’t want to, then-”

“No, no. You deserve an explanation.” Tyler nodded as he drew circles into the blanket with his index finger. “Some jerk came to the candy counter yesterday and…” Tyler swallows again. “It’s really stupid when I say it outloud,” He chuckled. “He wanted to.. Do things in the alley after my shift ended in exchange for free food. I said no, and he just wasn’t happy with the answer.” 

“Is that how you got all of those bruises?” Josh asked quietly, lifting a hand up to slowly touch the side of Tyler’s cheek, just barely grazing the man’s pale skin. 

“No,” Tyler spoke, turning his head away from the touch and watching Josh’s hand fall. “I think I got some from falling yesterday- and some from slipping again today, I’m not really sure.”

Josh watched Tyler with a hum, as if he were studying the other man. “Are you okay?” Josh asked after a few moments of silence. Tyler smiled sadly.

“No, no I don’t think so.” He chuckled dryly. “Therapy isn’t working anymore, and writing only makes me feel better for so long..” 

“Is that why you were writing in the bar the other night?” Tyler hummed in confirmation. 

“Tyler, I’m always here if you ever need to talk, alright? I’ll always be here no matter what.” Josh spoke softly, his hand moving to lay just over Tyler’s.

“We just started talking a few days ago.” Tyler pointed out, laughing unbelievingly at the wall.

“We did.” Josh agreed with a small nod.

“You won’t say that when you hear the worst parts of me, Josh. I don’t want to lose you.” Tyler spoke brokenly as his vision switched back to the other man who was watching Tyler intently, with a face contoured in a mix of worry and concern. Tyler’s heart skipped a beat then sped up about ten times. He could feel the hot tears welling up in his doe brown eyes. 

“God, how can you be so.. You!?” Tyler sobbed, his torso giving out as he let himself be wrapped into Josh’s warm embrace. His face landed in the crook of Josh’s neck as he sobbed quietly.

“Let it out, Ty..” Josh soothed, running his hand in soft circles against Tyler’s back. “Just let it out.”

“I’m scared, Josh..” Tyler sobbed, sniffling. “Everyone I meet- I can’t trust anyone, I can’t drink anymore- Today I was on the floor telling Brendon I wanted to die!” 

Josh breathed out four hot breaths into the fabric of Tyler’s hoodie before responding. “What happened?” He asked quietly.

“I don’t want you to leave me..” Tyler admitted, sniffling into the fabric of the other man’s shirt. “Please don’t leave..”

“I’m not going anywhere.” Josh spoke softly, lifting his head up so that he could see Tyler as he weeped into Josh’s shoulder. “I promise, as long as you’ll have me- I’ll be here.” 

 

Tyler smiled weakly and gripped onto the fabric that clung to Josh’s back. Josh pulled the other man close and whispered reassurances into his ear as they sat clinging to each other. Tyler sobbed until ran out of tears. Josh was happy to give something for the other to cry into. 

“I’m- I’m sorry, I’m a mess..” Tyler scoffed, sniffing as he kept his gaze focused on the bed spread

“No, no you’re not a mess. You’re just human.” Josh smiled, running his thumb against the heated skin of Tyler’s cheek as he wiped away the tears that still stained the pale skin.

“How do you always know just what to say?” Tyler laughed, grabbing lightly onto Josh’s wrists, keeping the other man’s skin close to his face.

“Experience.” Josh answered simply, a small smile tugging at his lips. Tyler laughed and shook his head in the others hands. His throat was sore and he desperately wanted to lean forward into the shorter man’s touch. He wanted to be held and never let go. He wanted to be loved.

“Shit..” Tyler hissed as his eyes caught a brief glimpse at the clock on his bedside table. “You have work tomorrow.”

“Already called off,” Josh spoke smugly. “Don’t worry.” He assured, his thumb lightly stroking over Tyler’s cheek as he watched the other.

“Does that mean you’ll stay with me tonight?” Tyler asked, a glimmer of excitement in his deep brown eyes. 

“Of course,” Josh smiled sweetly. “Whatever you want.” 

The two sat there for a moment, just watching each other in perfect, beautiful silence. Tyler could feel the world melt around the two, all of his stress and anxiety disappearing as if it were never there. One look in those big, brown eyes and Tyler felt like he could conquer the whole damn world.

l-/

When morning came, Tyler woke up alone with the thin covers thrown over his lower body and a throbbing migraine. He was beginning to think that last night was some sort of twisted dream.

“Jo-” Tyler winced. His throat could barely get a syllable out without feeling like his whole throat was on fire. He swallowed and sat up slowly, careful to not jostle his head too much and upset his already horrible migraine.

With his eyes closed, Tyler threw the blanket off of his lower body and his legs over the side of the bed. Tyler swallowed again and shook his head lightly before opening his mouth once more. “Josh? Brendon?” Tyler rasped out as loudly as he could. 

There was a brief silence before the sound of footsteps leading down the hallway sounded throughout the small apartment. Tyler winced at the exaggeratedly loud sound due to his migraine. The sound of the door creaking open made Tyler dig his fingers into the mattress. 

“Tyler, are you okay?” A familiar voice asked in a concerned tone.

“Please, be quiet.” Tyler hissed through gritted teeth, even if he were relieved that Josh was still here, he was still in pain.

Footsteps approached and before Tyler knew it, there was a familiar warmth kneeling in front of him and soothing hands holding his forearms lightly. “Is there anything I can do?” Josh asked in a hushed whisper.

“There’s.. There’s a tall orange bottle in the bathroom cabinet labeled Almotriptan in the bathroom.” Tyler answered quietly. He was prescribed the medicine to treat his chronic migraines a little over three months ago, and had hardly touched them since he brought them back, but this migraine was especially bad.

The man in front of him stood and walked off for a moment before returning soon thereafter. There was the sound of a bottle popping before two small pills were being dropped in Tyler’s hand. “Here,” Josh’s voice spoke quietly. “Something to wash it down with.” Then an already opened bottle of water was being handed to him. Tyler nodded stiffly before downing the two pills and half of the bottle. 

“Can you..” Tyler breathed out. “Close the blinds, please?” Tyler felt Josh’s footsteps in the floorboards before he heard the sound of Tyler’s blinds clicking closed. “Thank you.” Tyler whispered as he slowly blinked his eyes open. The room was dark enough now, that Tyler would actually be able to see the other man. He took a mental picture of the way Josh’s hair stuck up in weird places and how he was no longer wearing a hoodie, but a short sleeve t-shirt that fit in all the right places. Tyler would be blushing if all of his blood weren’t stuck in his head.

“Do you need anything else?” Josh asked almost lovingly as he kneeled in front of Tyler yet again, bringing a cold hand up to his cheek. 

Tyler smiled groggily and closed his eyes, trying to get his mind to focus. “Not right now, thank you, though.” 

“Of course.” Josh began running his thumb in small circles against the other man’s cheek as he watched his expression contorted into pain and back into it’s normal, relaxed form. “Do you want to lay back down?” 

Tyler nodded stiffly again. “Don’t leave, please?” 

“I won’t, promise.” Josh smiled softly up at the other man and slowly stood, carefully taking his hand away from the Tyler’s cheek. He helped Tyler lift his cast back onto the bed and covered him in his comforter. After making sure that Tyler had everything he needed, Josh climbed onto the bed and laid under the comforter and held the other close. 

“Josh?” Tyler spoke into the darkness. 

“Yes?” Josh responded, his face lightly pressed against the other man’s warm neck.

“I.. I really..” Tyler swallowed, his adam’s apple bobbing slightly in his throat. “I really like you.” 

“I really like you, too.” Josh hummed, his eyes focused on the side of Tyler’s pale face.

Tyler said nothing, but Josh could see the other man’s lips twist up into a smile and Josh couldn’t help but smile himself. Without hesitation, Josh leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to Tyler’s temple and then laid back down into his spot. 

They would be fine, Josh decided.


	6. Why did you leave?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler goes back to a place of his past for closure. Josh is there every step of the way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I plan on having the next chapter be the last, then hopefully an epilogue. This has been some adventure, I have to say. I'm really going to miss this work, but I feel like if I don't end it soon I never will. Stay safe <3

Over the course of the next couple of days, Josh continued to stay with Tyler when Brendon couldn’t. The only time Tyler was really alone anymore was when both Josh and Brendon had to work and absolutely had to leave Tyler to himself. Tyler didn’t mind being alone, he assured them, but they all silently knew that wasn’t why they were hesitant to leave Tyler by himself. 

Ever since Tyler was seventeen he was on his own. His parents had disowned him after he came out to his family. ‘You’re sick.’ His mother had said, her eyes welled up in tears. ‘You can come back once you figure out a better lifestyle.’ His father had stated as he shoved Tyler out the door, the only thing he had was his phone, about twenty dollars and some odd change, and the clothes on his back. He slept on the porch that first winter night, hoping that he would be let back in. They didn’t do so much as leave the porch light on.

Tyler swallowed dryly as he watched outside of the kitchen window. Heavy snow was falling from the dark sky to the cracked cement below. He sipped the coffee from his mug as he watched the passersby walk below. They looked like little ants from Tyler’s building, he could hardly make out the patch of neon yellow run from the front door to his old, beat up car on the side of the street. Tyler smiled sadly as he watched the man drive away. 

His crutches had come in the mail the other day, which meant no more bedrest for Tyler. He had never been more relieved and annoyed, than when Brendon came running into Tyler’s bedroom with the metallic crutches in his hands as he waved them around. Tyler let out a breath of laughter into his mug before taking another sip of his coffee. He set the mug down after finishing the hot liquid contents and picked up the crutches by the counter to aid himself in getting to the couch. He could’ve swore he had a yellow book laying around.. Ah. Underneath the coffee table. 

Tyler picked up the heavy book and set it down onto the glass table and began flipping through it’s contents. ‘Patty Joseph’ No, ‘Kevin Joseph’ Nope, ‘Lori Joseph, Shelly Joseph,’ Tyler shook his head, his index finger gliding down the page as he read each of the names with his last name. He began to lose hope of ever finding the right Joseph before- Kelly Joseph. Tyler’s heart skipped a beat. His hand brushed the page gently just over the black lettering that spelled out Kelly Joseph. She still lived at the same house Tyler grew up in. 

Tyler gripped the pages and swallowed harshly. God, he would love to see his family again. He shouldn’t, not after they threw him out of the house- but he did. He wanted to see his siblings- he missed them the most. They were all so young when he left. He missed so much of their childhoods- God, what did they think of him now? Do they even know if he’s still alive? Tyler swallowed, pushing the tears back. He sucked in a short breath as he reached into his pocket and grabbed his old, beat up phone and began dialing the number printed in thick, black ink against the bright yellow of the pages.

It took three rings for the person on the other end to pick up.

“Hello?” A woman asked on the other end. She sounded older than Tyler remembered. 

“Hi, uh, is this-” Tyler swallowed and closed his eyes as he began to tap his empty hand against his leg. “Is this Kelly Joseph?” 

“Yes, this is Kelly.” Tyler’s mother answered with a quiet chuckle. “And who is this?”

“This is- uh,” Tyler stammered, a pit in the bottom of his stomach opening wide enough to swallow the man whole. “Tyler, mom. It’s Tyler.”

The other end went silent and the pit opened wider. Tears stung the edges of Tyler’s eyes. He shouldn’t have done this- it was a mistake- he was causing more trouble than he was worth he should just- “Tyler..” His mother gasped out. “Oh, honey..” There was the muffled sound of a door opening then closing. “Where are you? Are you alright?”

“Yes, yes- I’m alright. I’m in my apartment.” Tyler assured.

“Oh, God- Tyler, I’m so sorry- for everything I’m-”

“Don’t, it’s okay. I promise. It’s okay. I’m fine.” Only a half lie, Tyler decided. 

“No, no. It’s not. I shouldn’t- Your father and I shouldn’t have- What happened should not have ever happened.” His mother admitted, her voice distraught.

“It’s fine, mom. That was a long time ago. I forgive you.” Tyler sighed sadly. “I agree that you shouldn’t have thrown me out like that- but it’s in the past. We can’t change it.”

There was a brief silence between the two for a few moments before Tyler’s mom spoke up once more. “Next week is Christmas,” She pointed out. “Your siblings will all be at the house, why don’t you stop by for Christmas dinner. That way we can all get to know each other again.” 

“Yes, I’d really love that.” Tyler smiled, wiping his eyes with the sleeve of Josh’s sweatshirt that he had stolen a few days back. “Do you think that I could bring a friend?” 

“Of course, honey. Bring whoever you like.” Tyler’s mom spoke sweetly. “Honey, I have to go- I’m at work. I’ll call you tonight, okay?” 

“Alright, talk to you tonight.” Tyler smiled briefly before the line disconnected. Well, that went better than expected. 

l-/

“I’m back!” I familiar voice sounded throughout the small apartment, followed by the sound of a door being shut. “You awake, Ty?” 

“I’m in the living room.” Tyler called back as the sound of filled plastic bags being set on the kitchen counter filled Tyler’s pale ears. He sat on the couch with his head hanging over the edge, looking at the wall behind himself. 

“You’re gonna give yourself a headache doing that, you know?” Josh chuckled, spinning his key ring on his pointer finger. 

Tyler hummed as he sat up and changed position on the couch to face the yellow-haired man. “You’re back early.” Tyler announced with a questioning look.

“Yeah, I had someone cover for me, figured we could go out and do something? Grab some food, see a movie, something to get you out of the house.” Josh shrugged with a stupid smile. 

“You’re not going to be able to pay your bills if you keep taking time off.” Tyler pointed out.

“So, no thank you, Josh?” Josh chuckled, stepping his socked foot over the back of the couch and onto the cushioning before settling beside the other man.

“Thank you, Josh.” Tyler rolled his eyes playfully and rested his head on Josh’s shoulder. “I am kind of glad you came back early,” Tyler sighed. “I called my mom.. And she invited me over for Christmas dinner.” 

“So?” Josh questioned, looking down at Tyler. “I don’t see anything wrong with that, she’s your mom.” 

“I haven’t spoken to my family in almost eleven years.” Tyler gulped, his adam’s apple bobbing slightly in his pale throat.

“Ah,” Josh nodded, understanding. “Why’s that?”

“They kicked me out after I came out to them,” Tyler shrugged. “They told me not to come back until I figured out a different lifestyle.”

“And have you?” Josh quirked up an eyebrow.

“No.” Tyler admitted.

“Then why go back?”

“Times have changed, they’ve changed. I miss them.” Tyler shrugged again. “I’m willing to give them a second chance if they are willing to give me one.”   
“Then do it. I’m sure they’ll want to apologize, or at the very least accept you for who you are.” Josh smiled and kissed the top of Tyler’s warm head.

“There’s one more thing..” Tyler admitted, Josh hummed. “I want you to go with me. I’m more confident when you’re next to me- you don’t have to go if you don’t want I just-”

“Christmas dinner, you said?” Tyler nodded. “Is your mom a good cook?” 

“From what I remember, yeah.” Tyler gave a confused look.

“Then I’ll be there.” 

l-/

The next week went by slowly for Tyler. He couldn’t decide if he was excited or dreading dinner with his family. Probably somewhere in between. He had no idea if anyone else from his family knew that he was coming besides his mom and dad. It would make for a pretty interesting dinner if his siblings didn’t know. He wondered if they even remembered him. Tyler shook his head and pushed the thought out of his mind. 

Tyler’s parents’ house was about a three hour drive from the city that Tyler lived in, so the two figured they’d rent a hotel room for the night, as neither of them were comfortable enough to stay in the Joseph house overnight just yet. 

The drive there was nice, Tyler thought. The two men held hands over the center console for a majority of the ride and there was hardly any snow falling, which made for an easy drive. So far, so good. 

“You nervous?” Josh asked, looking over to Tyler as they entered Tyler’s hometown. 

“Of course I am.” Tyler smiled nervously as he watched out the window. The sky was clouded pretty heavily, casting a dark shadow over his hometown. “I used to play basketball in high school,” Tyler announced as they passed by his old high school. “I even got offered a scholarship for it.” 

“Why didn’t you take it?” Josh asked, his hand squeezing Tyler’s comfortably.

“I had other plans,” Tyler smiled sadly. “I wanted to be a musician, write songs.” 

“Is that what you were doing that first night in the bar?” Josh asked with an interested look. 

“Not exactly.”

 

l-/

Tyler Squeezed Josh’s hand nervously as the two pulled up to the Joseph house. “Don’t worry,” Josh smiled. “Everything will be fine, promise.” He leaned over to press a soft kiss to Tyler’s temple after parking in the driveway. Josh looked at Tyler once more before stepping out of the car and running around to the passenger side to open Tyler’s car door and to hand him his crutches. 

“I think I’m going to have a panic attack.” Tyler admitted as he let out a short breath before stepping out of the car. 

“If you don’t feel comfortable at any time, let me know and we can make up some excuse and leave, okay?” Josh asked, his hand laying gently over Tyler’s forearm. “We can leave whenever you need to.” Tyler nodded and the two walked leisurely up to the same porch that Tyler slept on a freezing winter night much like this one. Tyler shuddered at the thought, but blamed it on the cold when Josh asked.

“You ready?” Josh asked as he watched Tyler briefly fumble with his button up. Tyler nodded as he combed a hand through his short hair. 

“As ready as I’ll ever be.” Tyler spoke with a short breath as Josh reached forward and rang the doorbell. 

There were hushed voices behind the front door that were too quiet to make out for both Tyler and Josh before the door was being opened. Behind it stood Kelly and Chris Joseph standing side by side, Chris’ arm wrapped around Kelly’s shoulders. They aged well, Tyler remembered thinking before he was being pulled into a bear hug by both of his parents while Josh was left to awkwardly watch the scene before it, not that he was complaining.

“It’s good to see you,” Tyler’s mom sobbed out into Tyler’s shoulder. “We’ve missed you so much, kid.” Tyler’s father chimed in just before they let go of their son. 

“It’s good to see you guys, too.” Tyler smiled, tears already filling his eyes that he refused to let fall. Not now, at least. 

“Who’s your friend?” Tyler’s mother asked, gesturing towards Josh as Tyler’s father reached out his hand to shake his hand. 

“This is Josh,” Tyler spoke, clearing his throat. “We’re.. Together.” 

Josh gladly accepted Chris’ hand. “Nice to meet you both.” He smiled, shaking the older mans hand.

 

“Welcome to the Joseph’s then, Josh.” Kelly spoke with a genuine smile as she pulled Josh into a hug. “Love the hair, why don’t you boys come in? It’s freezing out there.” 

l-/

As it turned out, Josh and Tyler had been the first of the invited to show up. As Tyler’s mother and father prepared dinner, they left Tyler and Josh to relax and get used to their environment. The house was almost exactly the same as Tyler remembered it, aside from the new awards and trophies that sat now in the place of his. The rug was newer and so was the tv. He also noticed that the kitchen had been slightly remodeled from the last time he saw it, there was new flooring that replicated the old, but other than that things on the first floor remained the same. He wondered what his parents did with his old room. Tyler made a mental note to ask about that. 

“Not so bad, huh?” Josh asked, entwining his hand in Tyler’s and placing a kiss on the side of the other’s mouth. “You worried yourself over nothing.”

“Yeah, well the night's not over yet.” Tyler sighed out and sat against Josh’s body so that his back was pressed to Josh’s side, causing Josh to wrap his arm around the other.

“It’ll go great,” Josh pressed another kiss to the back of Tyler’s head. “Promise.” 

l-/

It wasn’t until dinner was nearly finished that the rest of the Joseph siblings arrived. They didn’t even spot Tyler and Josh sitting on the couch when they came in. Tyler would have laughed if he weren’t so nervous. 

“Hey mom, dad.” Tyler heard Madison greet from the kitchen. “Sorry we’re late, the airport was a nightmare to get through, and don’t even get me started on the traffic.” Then there was the sound of laughter from the kitchen and Tyler could feel himself tear up again. 

“At least you all made it back in one piece,” Tyler’s mother joked. “Dinner’s just about ready, why don’t you three go wait in the living room as your father and I get the table ready, yeah? There’s a certain somebody that you all might want to see.” 

Next thing Tyler knew, all three of his siblings were walking into the living room and he could feel the pit in his stomach open again. He squeezed Josh’s hand tightly as he first made eye contact with Madison.

“Oh my God!” Maddy shouted, clasping both hands over her mouth before running towards Tyler. Luckily, he was able to stand quickly enough to catch his sister as she pulled him into a tight hug. “You- I’ve missed you-” Maddy squeezed tighter around Tyler’s waist, causing him to briefly struggle with his breathing. “I’ve missed you so much.” She admitted, lightly grasping the back of her brothers dress shirt with her manicured hand. 

“I’ve missed you, too.” Tyler admitted, holding his sister close almost as tightly as she was holding him. 

By the time the other Joseph let go, they were both crying messes. “Look what you did to me,” She laughed, running her fingers under her eyes to stop her mascara from running. “You’ve turned me into a crying mess.” 

Tyler laughed and ran the sleeves of his dress shirt against his eyes to wipe away the still flowing tears. “It’s nice to see you, Ty.” Jay chuckled happily as he pulled his brother into a lighter hug before moving back to make room for Zack.

“It’s been too long,” Zack mumbled into Tyler’s shirt as he also pulled him into a shirt hug. “I’m glad that you came.” 

“It’s, uh.” Tyler chuckled softly as he wiped away his tears. “It’s really nice to see all of you.” He smiled happily as he looked at all of his siblings. Not in a million years did he imagine any of this to be possible. He could hardly believe it now. They were all so.. Grown up now. It seemed like just yesterday they were playing in the treehouse that they all created with their father. Tyler wondered if it were still in the backyard like it was when he left. “Before I leave I want all of your numbers so that we don’t lose touch again.” 

Before anyone could respond or question who the man with neon-yellow hair that sat on the black sofa was, their mother was calling the family into the dining room for dinner. Tyler’s siblings were the first to leave the room, leaving just Josh and Tyler. “See, that went well.” Josh smiled, handing Tyler his crutches before the two walked off into the dining room.

l-/

“So, Joshua, what do you do for a living?” Tyler’s father asked as he took a bite from his mashed potatoes. 

“Well, right now I work at Guitar Center to pay for college classes.” Josh answered confidently. 

“Why Guitar Center?” Chris asked curiously. 

“My parents know the owner personally, but I also have a passion for the drums. They also pay me decently well over there so, I’m sticking with it for now.” Josh spoke with a slight nod before taking a sip from his water.

“Do you two live together?” Was the next question asked as Tyler’s dad continued eating.

“No, but I’ve been staying with Tyler for a few days as he’s been recovering from a hairline fracture in his foot.” Josh began as he himself continued eating. “He only has a few more weeks before he gets the cast off.” 

“How did you do that, Tyler?” Kelly interjected before Chris could say any more, even though Josh didn’t really mind the questions. 

“I lost my temper and kicked my car, probably a little too hard.” Tyler spoke with a half smile and a shrug. 

“Why did you lose your temper?” Tyler’s father cut in once again. 

“It’s kind of a long story.” Tyler chuckled nervously as he began to mindlessly eat various items on his plate, in hopes that no one would prod the subject any further. 

“Can I ask something?” Maddy spoke up from the other end of the table. Tyler nodded with a small smile. “Why did you leave?”


	7. Everything.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler deals with old demons.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow! We're finally here, the end. I'm going to miss this work, but all good things come to an end, right? I hope everyone has enjoyed the journey to get here as much as I have! Thank you to everyone who left kudos or comments, you don't even know how much it all means to me! Epilogue to come. Stay safe! <3
> 
> As always, please leave a comment telling me how you feel.

“Why did you leave?” 

There was the sound of silverware hitting glass as Tyler’s smile dropped. Had nobody told his siblings what happened? Why Tyler was forced from his home by his own parents? The pit in Tyler’s stomach opened again as he swallowed anxiously. He should have prepared for something like this to happen.

‘Guess things around here aren’t as rainbow and butterflies as you thought they’d be.’ The voice in the back of Tyler’s voice spoke up, it was the first time in days that Tyler had heard from the unidentifiable voice. figures now would be the time, Tyler thought. 

“Tyler was going through some.. Issues at the time. He decided that he had to be by himself for a while.” Tyler’s father spoke up just as Tyler opened his mouth to answer his sister’s question.

“What?” Tyler asked in a scoff, his mouth still ajar as he watched as his father stared blankly back at him.

“He thought it would be best not to tell you when he left, isn’t that correct, Tyler?” Chris asked, not even bothering to look up from his plate as he began to cut at something on his plate. Tyler himself had suddenly lost his appetite.

“No, that’s not correct.” Tyler hissed just as he felt Josh squeeze his hand lightly from under the dining table. It was a warning for Tyler to pace himself before he did something he would later regret. ‘Go on, let ‘em have it. They deserve it.’ The grave voice advised. 

“I didn’t leave- I was kicked out by you! I didn’t willingly walk out into a blizzard in the middle of the night!” Tyler spoke angrily as he placed his fist harshly onto the table, knocking his own silverware onto the wooden flooring with a loud clink.

“Tyler, honey, calm down.” Kelly suggested, placing both of her hands over Tyler’s shaking fist. The pale man turned to look at his mother. Her eyes were filled with a silent plea for Tyler to stop, just stop. He knew that look all too well. 

“Don’t-” Tyler closed his dark brown eyes as he pulled his hand away. “Don’t call me that.” The room went silent. Tyler focused his gaze on his father, Chris Joseph, as he just sat there- eating like he hadn’t done a thing wrong.

“I looked up to you, dad. I thought you were the greatest man alive as a kid- I wanted to be just like you when I grew up.” Tyler choked out as he felt Josh rubbing his thumb in circles against the soft surface of Tyler’s palm in an attempt to comfort him. “If you love me- if you ever loved me, then tell them- tell them about how you kicked your own son into the winter night because he was different.” Tyler commanded, already standing weakly on his shaking legs.

“I’m afraid I don’t understand.” Chris spoke back, merely stabbing a piece of broccoli and pushing the green vegetable into his mouth. Tyler was disgusted. “You must be confused again.”

“You’re pathetic.” Tyler shook his head with a dry chuckle. “At least take responsibility for your actions.” Tyler spoke as he watched the scene before him. Tyler’s mother was crying into her husband's shoulder and mumbled things that Tyler couldn’t quite make out, Maddy stared blankly at her parents and neither of his brothers seemed to know what to do. “Sorry for ruining dinner.” Tyler muttered, grabbing his crutches from beside his chair.

l-/

“Can we just go home, please?” Tyler asked as he watched out the dark window of Josh’s car. 

“It’s about a three-hour drive.” Josh pointed out as the two sped down the vacant highway. 

“I want to get as far away from that house as possible.” Tyler sighed as his eyes began to fill with tears that he refused to let fall until he was alone again. He couldn’t believe that he thought they changed- that they actually regretted what they had done to him. Tyler shook his head faintly as he pushed his thoughts to the back of his mind. He couldn’t- he wouldn’t deal with this now. 

There was no verbal reply from the other man, just a comforting hand laid over Tyler’s own as the two drove in silence with nothing but the sweet sounds of rock in the background. 

l-/

It ended up taking the two men a little over four hours to get back to Tyler’s apartment that night, as most of the highway was covered in ice and sleet. At one point Josh had even suggested the government fund a giant hairdryer for just melting road ice. Tyler may have snorted at Josh’s suggestion. Just may have.

 

“I can’t believe it’s only eleven.” Tyler admitted as the two lay on the couch, Tyler’s head and neck draped over Josh’s lap as Josh ran his hands through Tyler’s short hair. “It feels like we were there for hours.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” Josh prompted, his eyes shifting their gaze from the blank television to Tyler’s soft features. 

“No,” Tyler answered honestly. “I mean- what is there to talk about? I can’t change what happened that night or the night all those years ago.” He shrugged. “It is what it is, y’know?” 

“It shouldn’t be.” Josh shrugged with a soft breath. “I just want the best for you, it sucks that your parents are so shitty.” 

“Hey,” Tyler reached up and poked the side of Josh’s face. “Stop being so perfect, you’re making me look bad.” Josh’s face lit up red as he smiled softly.

“Stop, you’re pretty perfect, too.” Josh spoke quietly as he watched Tyler as if he were some sort of rare artifact in some museum. There was a short silence between the two as they both watched the other’s eyes as if one of them looked away the other would disappear without a trace. 

“I love you.” Tyler admitted, his heart racing rapidly inside of his chest. He had never felt this way about anyone before in his entire life. He felt like he could capture the sky. 

“I love you, too.” Josh spoke with the brightest smile Tyler had ever seen on any other person in his lifetime. It was truly captivating. Tyler reached up with both hands, pulling the other man’s face down to his as he captured Josh’s soft lips in his own chapped ones. There was a brief moment of awkwardness where both of the men didn’t quite know what to do before Tyler began softly brushing his lips against the other man’s.

“Can we switch the position a little? My neck is starting to hurt.” Josh chuckled lightly after a few minutes of the two making out in the darkness of Tyler’s living room. 

“Of course.” Tyler spoke, already shifting so that he was sitting upright on the couch as he was eager to feel the warmth of Josh’s lips against his own once again. There was a moment of movement before Josh was wrapping his hand around the back of Tyler’s neck, pulling the other man close before reconnecting their lips. ‘I love you, I love you, I love you’ Tyler’s mind was on an endless loop as their lips slid together. He was convinced he could do this all night. 

Tyler wasn’t sure how much time had passed when Josh was pulling away again, resting his head lightly on Tyler’s shoulder as he panted into the darkness. “My lips are so swollen.” Josh commented with a huff that Tyler assumed to be a breathless laugh. 

“Oops.” Tyler laughed as he struggled for his own breath. It had been so long since he had done anything like that. “If it makes you feel better, mine are too.” 

“Hmm..” Josh pretended to think. “It kind of does, actually.” He smiled into the fabric of Tyler’s hoodie that was technically Josh’s, even if Tyler hadn’t taken it off but three times in the last week. 

“God, I love you.” Tyler admitted again with a fake eye roll. He was convinced he could spend the rest of his life with Joshua Dun. 

“I’m glad to know the feeling is mutual.” Josh smiled, pressing a chaste kiss to the skin on the side of Tyler’s neck. The warmth made Tyler shiver. 

l-/

 

When morning came, Tyler awoke to a still sleeping Josh lightly spooning him from the inside of the couch. Tyler blinked tiredly into the newfound daylight that shed through the open blinds in the living room. He briefly considered shutting his eyes and forgetting the world and all its problems for a little longer before the feeling of hunger set in. Right, he hadn’t finished eating last night. 

Tyler sighed inwardly before lightly lifting and setting down Josh’s tattooed arm down onto the couch and standing. Ah, his cast, right. Tyler grabbed onto the side of the couch for support as he ventured into the newly stocked kitchen, thanks to Josh. Due to laziness and his desire to let his boyfriend sleep for as long as possible, Tyler decided on a bowl of cocoa pebbles for breakfast. 

Tyler hummed lightly as he ate his breakfast, his mind drifting back to the events of last night as he stared blankly at the wooden floor. The harsh words his father spoke drifted inside of Tyler’s head for a few moments before he felt his phone vibrate in the pocket of his sweatpants. Tyler set his mostly-eaten bowl of cereal in the almost full sink before reaching into his pocket to retrieve his phone. 

“Hello?” He asked, swallowing the mouthful of cocoa pebbles he had neglected to swallow before answering.

“Tyler?” The voice on the other end asked. “It’s Maddy, I got your number off of mom’s phone after you left. Are you alright?”

Tyler ran a hand through his hair as he stepped across the kitchen to make sure that Josh wasn’t up. “Yeah, yeah I’m fine.” Tyler chuckled dryly. “Are you? Thing’s got pretty heated yesterday.”

“Of course I’m fine. It’s you I’m worried about.” Maddy chuckled on the other end.

“How’s everyone doing?” Tyler asked, being unsure what else to talk about.

“Mom’s really upset, she freaked out on dad after you left. Jay and Zack are still sleeping in their rooms.” 

“And Chris?” Tyler asked, internally cringing at the mere mention of the man.

“He hasn’t really talked about it, as far as I can tell, he’s acting like nothing happened.” Maddy sighed. “I’m sorry, Ty.” 

“It’s fine, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t expect that.” Tyler shrugged, brushing his free hand through his hair. “What are you up to?” 

“Well, I was actually wondering if we could meet up for breakfast or something? It’d be really nice to catch up after..” 

“Yeah, of course.” Tyler agreed with a smile. It would be nice to see his sister again after what happened the last night at dinner. “You do know that I live about three hours away from where you are, right?” He asked with a slight laugh.

“What do you say we meet up somewhere in the middle?” Maddy proposed.

 

“Sure, send me the address and I’ll be there.”

 

l-/

After changing and freshening up the best way he could while wearing a cast, Tyler debated with himself on whether or not he should wake Josh to tell him where he was going. On one hand, waking Josh would cause less confusion and Tyler wouldn’t have to deal with a potentially upset Josh when he came back, but on the other hand, Josh deserved to get some sleep and he really did not want to wake his boyfriend when he was sleeping so peacefully. 

Then, an idea popped into Tyler’s head. He reached over Josh to grab the pad of sticky notes that sat on top of the stack of unused magazines, careful not to disturb the sleeping man as he wrote in big, blocky letters ‘Going out to breakfast with Maddy, see you soon. -Tyler’ and stuck it carefully on the other man’s forehead before placing a soft kiss over the paper. 

Tyler would have taken a picture of the other man if he didn’t have a taxi waiting for him downstairs. 

l-/

Tyler was the first to arrive to the small, vacant restaurant that his sister had picked out for them. He set his small messenger bag on the inside of the booth and his crutches balanced against the wood lining of the seat. Tyler let out a breath of relief as he let himself collapse down into the fake red leather seat. Between last night and this morning, Tyler really hadn’t had a chance to take in the events of last nights dinner. What had been said by his father, what he said, what the rest of his family felt- hell, he might have single handedly broken apart his family, going by what Maddy had told him. 

Tyler shook his head and reached into his messenger bag, pulling out his old, beat-up notebook. He made a mental note to buy a new one before going home. Tyler watched out the frosted window for a few moments, for what? He didn’t know. The parking lot outside of the window was completely empty, aside from what he assumed was the only waitress’ car. There were no cars on the road now, Tyler couldn’t decide if it was because of the holiday season or the time of day. Probably both. 

By the time that Tyler snapped out of his own thoughts, he had already written a page and a half in his notebook with the black ball-point that he didn’t remember picking up. Tyler hadn’t been writing in his notebook as much since Josh started staying with him, Tyler couldn’t decide if that were a good or bad thing. Maybe something in the middle. It gave Tyler less to show his therapist every week, which was good, Josh had assured him. It meant that Tyler could start going bi-weekly and maybe eventually monthly. Something about that thought made Tyler sad. He had been seeing his therapist for about a year and a half now and saying goodbye to something- someone that he had become so dependant on seemed so.. Terrifying. 

The next time Tyler was snapped from his thoughts was when the bell above the front door chimed signifying that a new customer had entered the quaint restaurant. Tyler hummed slightly, not bothering to look up from his table as he shuffled all of his things that he had laid out on the table into his messenger bag as he heard footsteps approach his booth. 

“So, what are you thinking for-” Tyler swallowed as the other patron sat across from him in his both. A pit opened in Tyler’s stomach as he watched the other carefully. “What are you doing here?” He asked in a hushed vexed tone.

“Your sister asked me to come.” His father answered back. He looked like he hadn’t slept at all since last night. “I thought we could talk about last night.” 

“I-” Tyler began, but quickly shut his mouth as he thought. “Why did you even invite me to dinner if you weren’t going to admit to what you did? That was the least you could have done after, after-”

“I know. I’m sorry.” His father sighed quietly as he rubbed at his tired eyes. “I don’t know why I did that- It was stupid.. I just let my pride get in the way.”

“Your pride? Are you serious?” Tyler scoffed, grabbing his messenger bag as he stood. 

“Please, stay. I want us to be on good terms before either one of us leaves.” Chris spoke, grabbing Tyler’s sleeve lightly. Tyler let out a short sigh before sitting once again. 

“Fine.” Tyler spoke, setting his bag aside. “But if you say one more-”

“I know.” His father spoke softly. “I know.”

“Why did you kick me out? Was I being attracted to men too shameful for you? Could you not handle the thought of other people judging you for having a gay son?” Tyler chuckled dryly, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Son, you’ve got to remember-” Chris sighed, rubbing at his eyes again. “I’m from a completely different generation- a whole different world than you are from. I was taught that being- being something like that was wrong. At the time, I didn’t know any better way to go about that.. Situation.”

“Is that supposed to make it okay?” Tyler rolled his eyes. “I was ready to forgive you for everything yesterday, dad.” Tyler spoke, emphasizing the last word of his sentence. “But then you- when you said all of those things, made it out to where I chose to abandon my siblings, you, and mom- I missed out on everything. I didn’t get to see any of my sibling's graduate- I didn’t even get to graduate. Do you know I can’t even get a decent job? I live in a crappy apartment that barely has any heating.”

“I never said that it was supposed to make things okay. There wasn’t a day that you were gone that I didn’t regret those things, but there’s no way for me to go back and fix them.”

“I don’t want you to fix them, dad! I want you to take responsibility for the things you did to me! I want you to tell Jay, Zack, Maddy- everyone, what you did. That you threw your son out into the cold, winter night to freeze because you couldn’t live with the fact that he was gay.”

“Can I get you, two gentlemen, anything?” Their waitress asked, interrupting the two’s conversation. 

“A coffee, black.” Tyler answered as he watched the snow outside of the window. 

“Same for me and two eggs, over easy.” Chris ordered with a slightly broken smile. The waitress smiled back and took the father and sons menus.

“It’s already done.” Tyler’s father spoke as he sat back in the booth. 

“What?” Tyler asked, unbelieving. 

“I told you sister this morning and your two brothers last night after you left. I didn’t want to lose you a second time.”

“This doesn’t fix everything,” Tyler warned. “Don’t expect me to warm up to you and act like nothing ever happened.”

“I would never expect that.” Chris answered truthfully. “I expect quite the opposite.”

It was silent for a while after that. Tyler continued to stare out his window as his father ate his breakfast, half contemplating texting Josh to come and get him even if he were an hour and a half out of town. The pit in Tyler’s stomach had shrunk slightly since silence filled the small restaurant yet still gaped open. There was so much he blamed on his father- so much he wanted to yell at his father for, but nothing he could ever change no matter how much he desperately wanted to. 

“So, Joshua.” His father began as he pushed his plate away and off to the side. “You’re happy with him? He’s a good kid?” 

“Yeah, I’m very happy with him.” Tyler admitted with a slight laugh. “I’m probably happier with him than I’ve been in a long time.” He spoke with a shrug.

“Oh?” His father spoke in confusion, prompting Tyler to go on. 

“There’s.. There are things that have happened to me since you kicked me out. I’ve been seeing a therapist since they’ve happened, It helped a little- but it wasn’t until I met Josh that I knew that good people truly existed. He was nice, understanding- he didn’t judge me like other people do like even my therapist does.. He’s a good man.” 

“Did someone hurt you, Tyler?” His father asked, a look of worry spreading across his face.

“A while ago, yeah.” Tyler shrugged. “I’m okay- well, now I am. I’m fine, dad- really.” He assured with a forced smile. 

“Did you see their face?” Chris asked, practically ignoring everything past ‘yeah’. “Do you remember their face, Tyler?”

How could he not? Tyler inwardly scoffed. The man that hurt Tyler was taller than he was, had a stronger, larger build than Tyler did. He had a short beard and short brown hair. He had a small scar above his right eye that he told Tyler came from his childhood. Something told Tyler afterward that the man was lying. 

“No.” Tyler lied, knowing that too much of a deal would be made of the situation, regardless of how little could be done about it now. Tyler did his research many times. 

Chris watched Tyler carefully for a few moments as if he knew- absolutely knew that Tyler was lying. “Well, if you remember, please, tell me.”

Tyler promised he would do his best and they left it at that. The rest of the time was spent with Tyler and his father discussing anything and everything Tyler missed. There were small moments where things got a little heated, rather it be from Tyler’s end or his father’s, but they got over them. Some easier than others. For the first time in a long time, Tyler was.. Content. 

l-/

“Josh?” Tyler called out into the apartment as he flicked on the hallway light and kicked off his shoes. “You awake?” 

“You’re finally home!” Josh announced excitedly as he ran into the hall, sliding to Tyler in his socks. “I was starting to get worried.” Josh admitted as he wrapped the other man in his arms, pressing a soft kiss to the side of Tyler’s mouth as he did.

“I’m fine,” Tyler laughed. “I just went out to breakfast.” He assured, wrapping his arms around Josh’s warm middle.

“How did it go?” Josh asked as the two began to lightly sway from side to side.

“Not as planned.” Tyler admitted. “I’ll tell you about it once I get my coat off.” 

“Alright, I’ll wait for you in the living room.” Josh spoke with a smile as he pecked Tyler’s freezing lips before walking down the hallway and into the living room. Tyler smiled lightly as he watched his boyfriend leave. He unzipped his jacket slowly and set it carefully on the empty coat hook, right next to Josh’s. 

During the taxi ride home, Tyler realized that neither the voice in his head or the hole in his stomach would go away until he opened the entirety of his mind up to the man he loved. It wouldn’t be pretty and Tyler knew that it would take a toll on himself- but it needed to be done. If not now, then not ever. 

He would tell Josh everything.


	8. Epilogue.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A wrap up on the previous chapters of The Miscellaneous Man.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been promising you guys an epilogue for months now and here it is. In all honesty, I feel like the last few chapters were a little rushed and that's a really gross feeling for me. Augh. There was just a lot that I wanted to do with certain characters, that I didn't really get to and I really regret it. I'm planning on going back and tweaking a few things later on, but I'm not sure yet. As always, comments and kudos are appreciated. 
> 
> Stay safe <3

The relationship between Tyler and his family continued to improve after his breakfast with his father the morning after Christmas. Things were still a little tense between the two after everything said, but things were still improving. Tyler got to see his parents regularly, as they only lived about an hour and a half away from each other. The first time that Tyler was able to see his entire family again was April sixteenth for Easter Sunday. The family all gathered at the Joseph residence on the Friday of the same weekend where they caught up. Luckily, that time was much different from the last.

l-/ "So, Mr. Dun-" Chris Joseph began, open beer in hand as he and Josh sat on the front porch of the house, watching the night. "Josh. Just call me Josh." He spoke warmly as he held his own, lite beer in hand. "Yes, Josh sorry. You and Tyler have been together for a while now, yes?" Mr. Joseph asked as he took a drink from his bottle. "About four months now, sir." Josh confirmed. "And you love him?" Chris asked. Josh nodded. "I wouldn't be here if I didn't. Your son is a great man, Mr. Joseph. I wouldn't trade him for the world." Chris smiled, taking another drink. "That was the right answer, Mr. Dun." l-/

The cast on Tyler's foot had finally been removed not too long ago. The first step to recovery, the next being physical therapy every Monday and Wednesday from ten in the morning to twelve. At least it gave Tyler something to do during the day when Josh and Brendon were at work. Tyler had grown closer with his famously reserved and irritating co-worker over his recovery period. Studies say that in a healing state like Tyler's, a person is far more susceptible to depression and anxiety than a healthy and active person. Tyler wouldn't have considered himself a particularly healthy and active person before his accident, but he took his friend's advice anyway. 

l-/ Brendon would usually drop by before his night shift at the theater on days that he wasn't too busy. Sometimes he would bring food or a newly released movie that he thought Tyler would be interested in. You would assume because of the fact that Brendon worked at a movie theater, that that would be the last thing he would be interested in doing with his time off. "Aren't you guys still showing this in the theater?" Tyler asked in between chews as he threw the disc copy of 'Spider-Man: Homecoming' on his coffee table. "Yep." Brendon answered, popping the 'p' on the end. "Didn't know you were into Spider-Man." Tyler laughed with a shrug. "I prefer Tobey Maguire." Brendon shrugged as he propped his feet onto the table and sat back into the couch. "Really? I thought he did way too much crying in that last movie. Andrew Garfield is my Spider-Man." Tyler spoke with a laugh as he watched Brendon's face contour in almost-disgust in the dark lighting from the tv. "Whatever! You just like Andrew because you think he has a good face." Brendon rolled his eyes and sunk into the couch as Tyler laughed. He wasn't wrong l-/

After just a few weeks of physical therapy, Tyler was able to go back to work. Though, he was told to 'keep it easy' by his doctor and therapist. Tyler would have rolled his eyes if he didn't know how he injured himself last time. He really did not think that he was capable of giving himself that serious of an injury. Funny to laugh at now, very un-funny then. 

l-/ Tyler let out a faint breath as he and Josh pulled into the nearly-vacant parking lot. "Are you sure you're ready for this? You're still technically on medical leave." Josh reminded, squeezing his boyfriends hand lovingly. Tyler nodded. "It beats sitting at home all day." He shrugged with a nervous smile. "Plus, I am kind of starting to feel bad letting my friends work overtime for me." Tyler shrugged again, Josh smiled. "You're so.. you." He spoke as he watched Tyler lovingly. "Thanks?" Josh laughed. "It's a compliment. Do you need help getting inside?" Josh asked, slightly squeezing the other man's hand in his own. "No, I'm fine. I will take a kiss though?" Josh just smiled and nodded as he let go of his lover's hand in favor of lightly grabbing onto each side of Tyler's cheeks and bringing him closer until their lips were meeting. Tyler supported himself on the center console as he began kissing back, one hand moving to the now blue-haired man's side to pull him as close as making out in a car could allow. Josh was just brushing his tongue against Tyler's bottom lip when there was a loud knock on the driver's side window, causing the two to jump. "Hey! No PDA in the parking lot, you two!" Brendon called through the partially cracked window before he was walking away from the car and into the theater doors. "Well, I'm never living that down." Tyler groaned into the fabric of Josh's polo tee with a slight smile. "No way." Josh agreed, his voice just barely breathless. l-/

It wasn't too long before Josh was fully moving in with Tyler to his decent-sized apartment. It wasn't too different from the two's arrangement before Josh 'officially' moved in, it was just a lot more stuff to crowd their apartment. 

l-/ "So, it's official then." Josh sighed as he sunk into the couch, coffee cup of wine in hand. "Hm?" Tyler prompted. "You're stuck with me." Josh admitted with a happy sigh as he entwined his fingers with his boyfriend's and brought their joined hands towards his face and planted a warm kiss against the back of Tyler's hand. "Ew. Gross, stop." Tyler groaned with a heated face and a happy smile. "Stop what?" Josh asked with a curious look playing over his features. "Being so... domestic. It's gross." Josh laughed and brought Tyler closer, pressing sloppy kisses to his lover's cheek, making sure to add the gross suction kiss sound that he knew Tyler /hated/. Tyler laughed loudly, weakly trying to push his boyfriend away from him. "Josh! Stop it!" Tyler laughed happily, the sound echoing off of the nearly bare walls. Josh didn't stop and the pair laid together on the couch that night laughing and kissing like teens in love. l-/

Tyler would go back to work for only a few weeks before deciding that where he was working, how he was treated- just wasn't where he wanted to spend his life. 

l-/ "Tonight you're working the graveyard shift, Jenna just called in sick." Tyler's boss had announced after Tyler had already finished his shift for the night and had gone to retrieve his pay for the week. "Sir, I can't- I have plans with my boyfr-" Tyler began as he fumbled with the draw strings of his thick hoodie. "Yes, Mr. Joseph, we all know that you have a boyfriend, but there isn't any other option." His boss shrugged, stacking a few sheets of paper on his desk. "What about Brendon or Mark?" Tyler asked desperately as he knew that Josh was waiting out front for him. "Can't get a hold of them." He explained lazily, not bothering to look up from his too-small desk. "Fine, but I have to run out front-" Tyler sighed, running a hand through his messy hair as he began to walk from his bosses office and back into the hall to tell Josh that he would have to work late and cancel their dinner plans. "Fairy." A gravelly voice spoke from the room Tyler had just left. Tyler looked back at his bosses door, his blood boiling under his skin as the activist inside of him shouted at him to say something to the old bastard. He just shrugged and continued walking from the office until he reached the front doors, pushing on them until they opened up into the outside world. Tyler smiled to himself as he saw Josh's old beat up car parked out front of the theater. "Did you have a good night at work?" JOsh asked, kissing his boyfriend's cheek softly before shifting gears into drive. "Yeah, I just quit." l-/

Things weren't all fairy tails and gum drops just yet. Tyler still had problems with his self-image and that old voice inside of his head would still sometimes make himself present. Josh had even given it a name once, during one of Tyler's panic attacks. Blurryface.

l-/ "Tyler! I'm home, got take out!" Josh called throughout their shared apartment as he dropped the bag of Chinese and his keys down on the island in the kitchen. Impatiently, the blue-haired man reached into the brown bag and grabbed a piece of chicken that had little bits of rice stuck to it. "Tyler?" Josh called again, this time walking back out to the living room to find it empty. Josh hummed in a confused tone as he made his way to the hall and stopped just as he thought he heard something behind the bathroom door. He pressed his ear to it and closed his eyes. It only took a few moments to identify the sound behind the door as quiet sobs. "Tyler? I'm coming in." JUst announced softly as he opened the door to find scattered pieces of glass surrounding his sobbing lover. "Oh, honey.. what happened?" Josh asked as he bent down before Tyler, careful not to crouch into any of the glass. "I-I can't.." Tyler sobbed and shuttered into himself. "You can, babe. Is he talking to you?" Josh asked as he placed a hand on Tyler's shoulder, and for a moment he thought he felt Tyler flinch away. "Can you describe him to me? What does he look like?" Josh asked desperately as he began to rub circles into the fabric of Tyler's hoodie. "I can't... I can't see him, everything's blurry, he doesn't have a face." Tyler gasped out as he began to violently scratch the skin on his arms. That was new. "Hey, hey, it's okay, I'm here, Ty. You need to stop." Josh hushed as he slowly pulled Tyler closer, separating Tyler's arms as he wrapped them around his own back, feeling Tyler's nails grip into the fabric of his shirt. Josh carefully lifted his lover from the bathroom and carried him to the living room, setting him lightly onto the soft couch. "Please, Josh- please don't leave me. I need you I need you I need you I need you-" Tyler spoke rapidly into the skin of Josh's neck. Josh couldn't help but feel a ping of sadness in his chest when he heard Tyler's words. Did he really think Josh would leave him? "Hey, hey. Don't talk like that." Josh smiled sadly. "I would never leave you, not in a million years. I love you." He spoke truthfully as he took Tyler's hands in his and began pressing soft kisses to his palms and wrists. "Now, tell this... Blurryface to get out of your head so that you can enjoy the food I brought home for us." l-/

They were a year and a half into their relationship by the time they got engaged.

l-/ "How is it?" Tyler asked as Josh took a bite out of his Chilli Cheese Burrito that took Tyler three restaurants to actually find. "Delicious." Josh answered happily with a hum as they both laid back on the blanket that Tyler had laid out for the two before Josh had arrived at the park that day. The sun was just starting to set and the other people populating the public park were starting to leave. "I'm glad." Tyler smiled and rolled over to plant a chaste kiss to the side of the other man's face. "Ewww you got taco cheese all over my cheek!" Josh exclaimed, forgetting his burrito in favor of wrapping his arms around his assailant's sides and get payback. "Josh, stop! Oh my god, your face is so greasy!" Tyler cried out as Josh began pressing soft kisses to Tyler's jaw and neck, coating each spot he touched in burrito grease. "Karma's a bitch." Josh laughed into Tyler's ear as he continued to place progressively less greasy kisses to the younger man's face. "I want to spend the rest of my life with you." Tyler sighed out, his eyes searching Josh's face for any reaction. "You do?" Josh asked as he continued peppering kisses across Tyler's jaw line. "Yes." Tyler breathed out anxiously. Tyler felt the older man above him tense slightly before sitting up in his spot, Tyler's arm lingering on Josh's side. He reached into the picnic basket briefly before asking Tyler to stand. Tyler complied, a little flushed and confused, but complied nonetheless. "Tyler Robert Joseph," Josh began, a cheesy smile lingering on his lips. Tyler felt his heart beat speed up in his chest. "I could be saying the cheesiest things right now, like how I love the way your face looks when you're concentrating on your writing, or how you can turn me on by just the way your voice sounds in the shower, or even how attractive you look in my sweatshirts, but judging by the amount of cheese grease on your face, I'm assuming you don't want anything to do with cheesy things." Josh smiled a toothy smile. Tyler couldn't help but return the expression. "All I'm going to say is that I love you for who you are and I hope that you feel the same about me. I want to spend the rest of every waking moment with you, Tyler. I love you." Josh breathed out anxiously. "Will you marry me?" l-/

And of course, Tyler said yes and Josh slipped a raspberry ring pop onto Tyler's finger. Between you and me, the band was a little too small for Tyler's ring finger. The couple would get married in the spring in New York. It was closer to Josh's small family and Tyler's sister, so why not, right? It was a small ceremony, but a beautiful one. Neither one of them would change it for the world. Though they had a little more problems to face with Tyler's depression and anxiety, they were happy in the end and that was all that mattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to the end, friend.


End file.
